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One-liners

A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!

One-liner #1341

woman winkIt's almost time to switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy Christmas anxiety!

  • Christmas Jokes
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  • Christmas One-liners

One-liner #1340

binocularsPrecision is a fuzzy concept.

One-liner #1339

angry manThe answer is maybe, and that's final!

  • Logic One-liners
  • Saying One-liners
  • Conflict One-liners
  • Self-Annihilating One-liners

One-liner #1338

angry young manPlease - I can only ignore one thing at a time.

  • One-liners
  • Respect One-liners
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One-liner #1337

motherly adviceJust because I have nothing to say is no reason why you shouldn't listen.

  • One-liners
  • Logic One-liners
  • Self-Annihilating One-liners

One-liner #1336

smiling workerI am a firm believer in optimism; because if you don't have optimism, what else is there?

  • One-liners
  • Logic One-liners
  • Truth One-liners
  • Self-Annihilating One-liners

One-liner #1335

white haired ladyI absolutely refuse to be assertive!

  • One-liners
  • Logic One-liners
  • Self-Annihilating One-liners

One-liner #1334

bald2When I want your opinion, I'll tell you what to say.

  • One-liners
  • Respect One-liners
  • Logic One-liners
  • Self-Annihilating One-liners

One-liner #1333

military inspectionWe can't get a volunteer army unless we draft it.

  • One-liners
  • Military Jokes
  • Self-Annihilating One-liners

One-liner #1332

stressI have something to say, but I don't know what.

  • One-liners
  • Silence One-liners
  • Logic One-liners
  • Communication Jokes

One-liner #1331

messy2Whenever I look for something, it's always in the last place I look.

  • One-liners
  • Accuracy One-liners
  • Logic One-liners
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One-liner #1330

lazyguyWhat keeps me going is my inertia.

  • One-liners
  • Exercise One-liners
  • Logic One-liners
  • Self-Annihilating One-liners

One-liner #1329

computer roomA computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing!

  • Computer Jokes
  • One-liners
  • Technology Oneliner
  • Logic One-liners
  • Conflict One-liners

One-liner #1328

woman angryIf 4 out of 5 people SUFFERS from diarrhea, does that mean that one enjoys it?

  • Bathroom One-liners
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  • Medical One-liners
  • Health Jokes

One-liner #1327

woman2If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.

  • One-liners
  • Logic One-liners
  • Truth One-liners
  1. One-liner #1326
  2. One-liner #1325
  3. One-liner #1324
  4. One-liner #1323

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