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Letters

Not "Foxy" Enough

Details
Written by: Pastor Tim
Published: 13 February 2016

foxWhen one PearyGates List subscriber unsubscribed in response to the "Hat Headline" joke I shared (which stars President Obama, The Pope, and Fox News - www.cybersalt.org/pearly-gates-jokes/hat-headline) I received the following feedback:

I resent your joke about the Pope and Obama. What I resent about it is your mockery of Fox News. It's the only new I trust to tell the truth about whats going on in politics. I thought you were a Christian. A preacher, so you say. Now I see what you really are!!!!!

 I replied:

Thanks for your feedback.  I have a few points in reply:

Created: 13 February 2016
Last Updated: 13 February 2016
  • Hall of Flames

Read more: Not "Foxy" Enough

I Find This 'Joke' Tasteless

Details
Written by: Pastor Tim
Published: 06 November 2012

As many of you know, I have a seperate newsletter for jokes that I think are funny but that might not be the "cup of tea" others are looking for from a pastor.  Each mailing I send out on the PearlyGates newsletter contains a caveate about the content, but still there are some that just don't understand it - such as Anne Marie S. In response to "Call the Doctor" (https://www.cybersalt.org/pearly-gates-jokes/call-the-doctor) she wrote:

"I find this 'joke' tasteless."

I replied:

Created: 06 November 2012
Last Updated: 06 November 2012

Read more: I Find This 'Joke' Tasteless

Do-Si-Don't Tell Jokes About Square Dancing

Details
Written by: Pastor Tim
Published: 27 December 2010

In response to the "Flu Do-Si-Do" joke (https://www.cybersalt.org/cleanlaugh-archive/5577-the-flu-do-si-do) the following comment was left anonymously under the name "A Caller" with a fake e-mail address.

This joke only perpetuates the hay-seed old time barn-dance that was Square Dancing. Modern Square Dancing is a Great & Fantastic, wholesome activity that is enjoyed by millions WORLD WIDE!!! We dance to every genre of music. Old & New. But, unfortunately, we can not seem to break "the image" of the dumb-hick hillbilly because of stupid things like this. I am ashamed that a "Church" would post something like this. Dance in Joy for the Lord and Let He that is without sin Cast the First Stone.

Created: 27 December 2010
Last Updated: 13 July 2011

Read more: Do-Si-Don't Tell Jokes About Square Dancing

Always Stop and Smell the Roses

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Written by: Claude Covington
Published: 08 December 2010

Pastor Tim:

Always stop and smell the roses!!

If you have a few minutes, reading this poem in this issue, brought a very old memory to this 83 year old mind…

icy plantI was home to North Carolina from San Diego, CA on boot leave in Feb. 1946.  We had cold weather with lots of freezing rain for a couple of days.  Then one day it cleared off but it was still pretty cold.  Everything was covered with ice.

We lived out in the country on a tobacco farm.  I told everyone I was going rabbit hunting!!  No self respecting rabbit would have been out in that cold, but it was a beautiful clear, cold and sparkly day so I got my rifle (a Winchester model 74 pump .22 that I had paid $11 for 5 years earlier.) and I went outside.

Right away, the first sound I heard was the tinkling of the ice in the trees.  What a beautiful sound that was!!!  God’s bells ringing quietly!!!  That was my first thought!!  What a beautiful sound that was and it accompanied me for the couple of hours that I walked around the edges of the fields of that farm.

I never did see a rabbit, but I really did not expect to.  That day still ranks as one of the very best days of my life.  I remember it very fondly.  I felt very close to our Lord that day!!

Thanks for your e-mails and your sermons.  I do enjoy every one that I listen to!!

Claude Covington
USA

Created: 08 December 2010
Last Updated: 13 July 2011

This is False Religion

Details
Written by: Pastor Tim
Published: 18 November 2010

j.*****@hotmail.com sent me the following feedback as to why they unsubscribed from the Cybersalt Digest newsletter.

jehovahs witness's have the truth, this is false religion

I replied:

Thanks for taking the time to send me your feedback.  It helped me to realize I'm being clear enough about what I believe.

- Pastor Tim

Created: 18 November 2010
Last Updated: 13 July 2011
  1. Kit Hates Christmas
  2. No News is Good News
  3. Thinking of Me
  4. Shelly W

Subcategories

Hall of Flames Article Count:  16

Hall of Flames - Pastor Tim's Hate MailThe world (and unfortunately some churches) have many discontented people and spiritual bullies. So when you try to uplift, entertain and encourage people, (and maybe even make them laugh) it only stands to reason that every now and then someone is going to go off the deep end on you. On the internet that deep end usually manifests itself through a vitrious and gall filled e-mail sent so the author can get his/her jollies by blasting you (otherwise known as a "flame").

Here is a collection of some of the more entertaining flames I have received. Don't worry about me. I've been around enough to know that such people come with the territory. Only, my approach is different that most other's. Most usually just get quiet or apologize in order to either placate the flamer and avoid getting burned up totally.

Me, I'd rather have a good laugh at their expense (after all I didn't make them type what they typed) and, in the case where they may attend the church I pastor, tell them to straighten up or go find another church to wreck.

Nobody eats sheep while this shepherd is on duty!

Laughable Article Count:  2

I like it when people make me laugh.  Here are some of the funnier letters I have gotten from list members/visitors.

Ask Pastor Tim Article Count:  3

Answers to some of the questions Pastor Tim has been asked - or should have been asked.

Appreciation Notes Article Count:  3

To quote actress Sally Field,
"You like me.? You really like me!"

Here are some of the notes of appreciation?I have received.

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