I like work; it fascinates me ... I can sit and look at it for hours.
- Jerome K. Jerome
One-liners
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Logic is the art of going wrong with confidence.
You don't need a parachute to go skydiving; you need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
- Hits: 1057
We have enough youth ... how about a Fountain of Smart?
When men are growing up and reading about Batman, Spiderman, and Superman, these are not fantasies - these are options.
- Jerry Seinfeld
- Hits: 1102
My girlfriend and I often laugh about how competitive we are; but I laugh more.
- Hits: 921
The best revenge is living well.
A fire hydrant has H-2-O on the inside and K-9-P on the outside.
Moses had the first tablet that could connect to the cloud.
There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.
I've just written a song about tortillas; actually, it's more of a rap.
Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.
- Jerry Seinfeld
- Hits: 1063
I ate a clock yesterday; it was very time consuming.
When life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic.
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather ... not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
- Hits: 1098