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Entertainment

The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4953 - October 24, 2024

Click here to view this edition online!  

The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

shapes of constant widthThere was no mailing last Sunday. A big chunk of my Saturday (when I write the news and line up the next edition) went to errands and shopping, tidying the house, and then picking up Grandma Cybersalt at the airport later in the evening. It's a lot of pressure taking care of Susan's favourite person while she is away!

Today's video share is a cool one about shapes of constant width.
Click Here to Watch

~ Pastor Tim 



Information Assistance

An man with long dark hair looking angrily at his phone."Information.  Can I help you?"

"I'd like the number of the Theater Guild, please."

"One moment, please." Pause.  "I'm sorry sir, I have no listing for a Theodore Guild."

"No, no.  It isn't a person.  It's an organization.  It's Theater Guild."

"I told you, sir.  I have no listing for a Theodore Guild."

"Not *Theodore*!  *Theater*!  The word is *theater*.
T-H-E-A-T-E-R!"

"That, sir, is NOT the way you spell Theodore."



One-Liner #1867

Close up of a dryer door.Remember, if you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes back as a Tupperware lid that doesn't fit any of your containers.



"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Be A Billionaire!


Cabbies

Six NYC taxi cabs waiting at an intersection.A cabbie is a fare-minded person.



Quote #2302

A close-up of the hands of a couple holding hands.Clint Eastwood, 94-year-old actor legend, formulated one of the most important lessons of his life so far for the young generation:

"Don't look for luxury in watches or bracelets, don't look for luxury in villas or sailboats! Luxury is laughter and friends, luxury is rain on your face, luxury is hugs and kisses.

Don't look for luxury in shops, don't look for it in gifts, don't look for it in parties, don't look for it in events! Luxury is being loved by people, luxury is being respected, luxury is having your parents alive, luxury is being able to play with your grandchildren. Luxury is what money can't buy."

- Clint Eastwood



Envy, Jealousy, Selfishness

Three brown chickens inside a barn.A man was having trouble getting his neighbor to keep his chickens fenced in. The neighbor kept talking about chickens being great creatures, and as such they had the right to go where they wanted.

The man was having no luck keeping the chickens out of his flower beds, and he had tried everything.

Two weeks later, on a visit a friend noticed his flower beds were doing great. The flowers were beginning to bloom.

So the friend asked him how he managed to keep the birds away. "How did you make your neighbor keep his hens in his own yard?"

"One night I hid half a dozen eggs under a bush by my flower bed, and the next day I let my neighbor see me gather them. I wasn't bothered after that."


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Susan Page writes . . . . 

Great Questions

A great blue heron standing on one leg near the shore, scratching its beak with its foot.- photo by Susan PageJesus is the expert when it comes to asking questions. His questions have a way of drawing out the truth from His respondents. One of the questions Jesus asked during His ministry was … “What do you want Me to do for you?” Isn’t that just the most awesome question?

We can put our imaginations to work as we read the stories laid out in Scripture. Take for example when Jesus called His first disciples.

Read more

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

Laughing Through Legal Woes: 13 Lawyer Warning Signs

picture of lawyer's office1. During your initial consultation he tries to sell you Amway.

2. He tells you that his last good case was a "Budweiser."

3. When the prosecutors see who your lawyer is, they high-five each other.

4. He picks the jury by playing "duck-duck-goose."

5. During the trial you catch him playing his Gameboy.

6. A prison guard is shaving your head.

7. He places a large "No Refunds" sign on the defense table.

  • Work Jokes
  • Pearly Gates Jokes
  • Lawyer Jokes
  • Top Ten Lists
  • Legal Jokes

Read more: Laughing Through Legal Woes: 13 Lawyer Warning Signs

Information Assistance

An man with long dark hair looking angrily at his phone."Information.  Can I help you?"

"I'd like the number of the Theater Guild, please."

"One moment, please." Pause.  "I'm sorry sir, I have no listing for a Theodore Guild."

"No, no.  It isn't a person.  It's an organization.  It's Theater Guild."

"I told you, sir.  I have no listing for a Theodore Guild."

"Not *Theodore*!  *Theater*!  The word is *theater*.
T-H-E-A-T-E-R!"

"That, sir, is NOT the way you spell Theodore."

  • Clean Jokes
  • Communication Jokes

Cabbies

Six NYC taxi cabs waiting at an intersection.A cabbie is a fare-minded person.

  • Clean Puns
  • Work Puns
  • Occupation Puns
  • Transportation Puns

One-Liner #1867

Close up of a dryer door.Remember, if you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes back as a Tupperware lid that doesn't fit any of your containers.

  • One-liners
  • Housework One-liners
  • Common Sense One-liners
  • Laundry Jokes
  1. Homeland Security Alert: The Bin Brigade's Office Invasion
  2. The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4952 - October 17, 2024
  3. One-Liner #1866
  4. Banking Hiccup

Subcategories

Clean Jokes Article Count:  3626

Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you?  Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4696
 

  

Christmas Jokes Article Count:  77

a picture of christmas ballsWe think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.

If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!

Your Turn to Be Funny Article Count:  3

It's your turn to be funny.  Submit your funny caption today.

Funny Elephant Pictures Article Count:  16

Are you looking for funny elephant pictures?  You've come to the right place!

Cybersalt Digest Archive Article Count:  1572

Games Article Count:  15

Here are the games we have on the site so far.  There aren't many but they're loads of fun.

Funny Pictures Article Count:  679

Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow.  We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often.  Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.

Funny Car Pictures Article Count:  169

Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.

Funny Cat Pictures Article Count:  231

catmelonhead150x127.jpgOver the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.

And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.

  

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4696

 

 

 

Funny Dog Pictures Article Count:  149

dog_maggie.jpgSome say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.

It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.

Funny Horse Pictures Article Count:  24

Here's our funny horse pictures collection.

Funny Christmas Pictures Article Count:  53

christmas cakeWe think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.

We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.

Merry Christmas!

Pearly Gates Jokes Article Count:  544

Here are some clean, theologically incorrect jokes.  Most of them have been featured in the PearlyGates section of the free Cybersalt Digest Newsletter - which you can subscribe to by clicking here.

FunBlog Article Count:  533

When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here.  If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!

Cartoons Article Count:  3119

These are some of our favorite cartoons.

Backpew Article Count:  2944

Clean Puns Article Count:  1996

Our collection of puns.

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4696

 

Funny Signs Article Count:  167

Our collection of funny signs.

One-liners Article Count:  2050

A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!

Chicken Humor Article Count:  1

Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart! 

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