Entertainment

Bidding at a local auction was proceeding furiously when the auctioneer suddenly announced,

"A gentleman in this room has lost a wallet containing $10,000. If it is returned, he will pay a reward of $2,000."

There was a moment's silence, and then from the back of the room came the cry,

"Two thousand five hundred!"

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Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday - and happy 76th birthday to my dad!

Grandma Cybersalt and I set an alarm to wake us up at 2:50am on Monday to watch the Queen's funeral. We both thought the music was beautiful. The Bible passages and truths proclaimed were powerful. I am grateful that so many millions of people could hear those words of hope of forgiveness and eternal live found in Jesus alone.

Today's video share takes a look at the "Changes to British Royal Titles Since the Death of Queen Elizabeth II." It's interesting look into the UK's constitutional monarchy.
Click here to watch the video.

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!

~ Pastor Tim

Responses to questions on 5th and 6th grade science tests:

- There are 26 vitamins in all, but some of the letters are yet to be discovered.

- Genetics explains why you look like your father, and if you don't, why you should.

- Vacuums are nothings. We only mention them to let them know we know they're there.

- The cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation. Evaporation gets blamed for a lot of things people forget to put the top on.

- Water vapor gets together in a cloud. When it is big enough to be called a drop, it does.

- Mushrooms always grow in damp places, which is why they look like umbrellas.

- Momentum is something you give a person when they go away.

- A monsoon is a French gentleman.

- The word "trousers" is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural at the bottom.

- To keep milk from turning sour, keep it in the cow.

- When planets run around and around in circles, we say they are orbiting. When people do it, we say they are crazy.

- For asphyxiation, apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead.

- Thunder is a rich source of loudness.

- One of the main causes of dust is janitors.

I find that a duck's opinion of me is very much influenced over whether or not I have bread.

- Mitch Hedberg

"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Two frogs were sitting on a lily pad. One said to the other, "Time sure is fun when you are having flies!"

"Life is unjust and this is what makes it so beautiful. Every day is a gift. Be brave and take hold of it."

- Garrison Keillor

Before - You take my breath away.
After - I feel like I'm suffocating.

Before - She says she loves the way I take control of a situation.
After - She called me a controlling, manipulative egomaniac.

Before - Saturday Night Fever
After - Monday Night Football

Before - Is that all you're having?
After - Maybe you should have just a salad, Honey.

Before - $60/doz.
After - $1.50/stem

Before - We agree on everything.
After - Doesn't she have a mind of her own?

Before - Charming and Noble
After - Chernobyl

Before - Idol
After - Idle

Before - He's completely lost without me.
After - Why won't he ever ask for directions?

Before - Croissant and cappuccino
After - Bagel and instant

Before - Oysters
After - Fishsticks

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

A man goes to Africa on a safari. While there, he comes upon an elephant, in great pain, with a giant thorn in its foot. The man very carefully approaches the elephant, and gingerly removes the thorn from its foot.

The elephant begins to walk away, then turns and stares at the man for a full minute, locking eyes with him.

I find that a duck's opinion of me is very much influenced over whether or not I have bread.

- Mitch Hedberg