Entertainment

I started a company where you can borrow hunting dogs for the afternoon; it's called, "We Lease the Hounds!"

Mummies aren't from the Stone Age or the Iron Age ... they're from the Bandage.

I told my daughter to check her attitude, and she responded,

"For complaints about attitude, please contact the manufacturer."

Cybersalt News

Happy Saturday everyone!

Grandma Cybersalt is away for the weekend at a church retreat, so I've been taking the chance to put in some long hours on a stack of work projects I've had on the go. I did take a break yesterday though — and a milestone break at that. When I broke my arm just over seven weeks ago there was no way I was going to be driving the pickup truck — it's a standard with a great big shifter coming up off the floor. But the surgeon's follow-up X-ray this week showed the bone has healed enough that I can finally start building strength back up. So today I figured it was time for a little test drive.

The truck mostly sits parked next to the house, and one of its main jobs is to wait for Susan to load it up with branches, grass clippings, and yard waste so we can run it over to the city works yard — they let citizens drop it off for free. Felt like a perfect short outing to test my shifting arm. I was very pleased to find it was up to the job. What was not up to the job, as it turned out, was the tailgate. I backed up to the dump spot, hopped out, and... the gate would not open. Now this isn't unheard of — the gate gets stuck once in a while, and the usual cure is to lurch the truck forward and back a couple of times to shake things loose. I tried that. Nothing. I tried pulling on the gate (my arm wasn't up to that one). I tried climbing in and kicking it. Nothing. I drove around the yard, which sits on a bit of a hill, hunting for bumpier patches to give the truck a good twist. Back to the dump spot. Still nothing. A kind fellow came over with his two good arms — between us we had three and a half arms — and even that wasn't enough. Closing time rolled around and I was the last one in the yard, so I drove home with a full load still in the back.

You can see where this is going. I backed up to my normal parking spot beside the house, walked around, gave the latch a little wiggle and a couple of taps — and the gate dropped open like nothing had ever been wrong. I had to laugh out loud. Of course. A good soak of WD-40 is on the assembly now, a bit of grease to follow, and Lord willing next Saturday's run to the works yard will be a little less interesting.

Today's video share is one I'm not even sure how to describe. It's probably one of the craziest creatures I've ever seen — and then partway through the clip you find out it isn't one creature at all, it's many creatures, which takes the whole thing to a whole new level.
Click Here To Watch

Enjoy the rest of today's Digest.

~ Pastor Tim

A young boy called the pastor of a local "corner" church to ask the pastor to come by to pray for his mother who had been very ill with the flu.

The pastor knew the family and was aware they had been attending another church down the road.

So the pastor asked, "Shouldn't you be asking Brother Simon down the road to come by to pray with your mom?"

The young boy replied, "Yeah, but we didn't want to take the chance that he might catch whatever it is that Mom has."

I told my daughter to check her attitude, and she responded,

"For complaints about attitude, please contact the manufacturer."

Mummies aren't from the Stone Age or the Iron Age ... they're from the Bandage.

"It does not matter how slowly you go, as long as you do not stop."

- Confucius

The minister of a well-attended, strong, and enthusiastic church often showed himself ready and able to deal with any situation that might come up.

One Sunday, just as the minister was reaching the climax of his sermon, his own young son entered the church, ran to the center aisle, started making loud beeps and brrrmms like a car without a muffler, then zoomed right toward him.

The minister stopped his sermon, pointed directly at his son, and commanded, "Jimmy, park the car immediately beside your mother on that bench (pointing), turn off the ignition, and hand her the keys."

The sermon continued undisturbed after a good laugh by the congregation.

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

In a few months, I will celebrate another birthday. Interestingly, these birthdays come every year. This year, if I've kept up to date, I will celebrate my 75th birthday. I never expected to get this far along in life. I always thought 75 was old.

If I believe one of my old uncles, my 75th birthday amounts to 7+5 = 12. So I will be 12 years old in a few months. I can't imagine what it's going to be like to be 12 once again. I guess I don't know the difference between 75 and 12. There may not be much of a difference.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.