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Entertainment

The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #5038 - August 24, 2025

The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings everyone!

Why the worst singer of all time sold out every concertGrandma Cybersalt and I celebrated our 39th anniversary yesterday. Surely her medal will arrive in the mail any day now!

Today's video share is an encouragement to us all: If you want to sing, sing as if everybody is listening!
Click Here to Watch

Enjoy the rest of today's Digest. 

~ Pastor Tim 



Travel Agent Stories

A side view of a woman in an office at a desk looking at one of her 3 computer screens.The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:

1. I had someone ask for an aisle seat on the airplane so that their hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.

2. A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost information, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California & then take the train to Hawaii ?"

3. I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Cape Town is in Massachusetts."

     Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in South Africa."

     Her response was "click".

4. A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.

     He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state."

5. I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?"

     I said, "No."

     He said, "But they look so close on the Map."

6. Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a 1-hour lay over in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and I need a car to drive between the gates to save time."

7. A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got into Chicago at 8:33am. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally I told her the plane went very fast, and she bought that!

8. A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to who?"

     I said, "No, why do you ask?"

     She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any connection?"

     After putting her on hold for a minute while "I looked into it," (I was actually laughing) I came back and explained that the city code for Fresno is FAT, and that the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

9. I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?"

     I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these stupid planes have numbers on them."

10. A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of those computer planes."   I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever."

11. A businessman called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa.

     "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those."

     I double-checked and sure enough, his stay needs a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express."

12. A woman called to make reservations. "I want to go from Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York."

     The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the agent asked, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?"

     "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the customer.

     After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere."

     The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly. Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!"

     The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?"

     "That's it! I knew it was a big animal!"



One-Liner #1951

An old white man sitting in the shade at an outdoor picnic area.Old age is a thing ... Last night I was in bed for 20 minutes when I heard the pizza guy cough downstairs; then I remembered I came to my room to get my wallet.




Time-Telling Technique

Ai image of bigfoot looking through an opening in the trees.How does Bigfoot tell time?

He looks at his Saskwatch!



Quote #2387

A black man with a background of question marks behind him, one finger on his chin, looking up and to his right, thinking."The greatest enemy of learning is knowing."

- John C. Maxwell



Choosing Sides

An iron sculpture of Abraham Lincoln sitting on a stone bench.At a White House dinner, a churchman offered a benediction and closed with the pious affirmation: "The Lord is on our side."

When President Lincoln did not respond to this sentiment, someone asked him, "Don't you believe, Mr. President, that the Lord is always on the side of the right?"

"I am not concerned about that," was Lincoln's answer, "for we know that the Lord is always on the side of the right. My concern is that I and this nation should be on the Lord's side."


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

Just Me and My Coffee

coffeeeeToday was special. The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage, her daughter and granddaughter went to St. Augustine for spring break. They would be gone for about three days.

In the meantime, I was here but not alone; I did have my cup of coffee. What more could anyone ask for?

Read more

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

One-Liner #1951

An old white man sitting in the shade at an outdoor picnic area.Old age is a thing ... Last night I was in bed for 20 minutes when I heard the pizza guy cough downstairs; then I remembered I came to my room to get my wallet.

  • One-liners
  • Ageing One-liners
  • Memory One-liners

Time-Telling Technique

Ai image of bigfoot looking through an opening in the trees.How does Bigfoot tell time?

He looks at his Saskwatch!

  • Clean Puns
  • Time Puns
  • Outdoors Puns

Travel Agent Stories

A side view of a woman in an office at a desk looking at one of her 3 computer screens.The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:

1. I had someone ask for an aisle seat on the airplane so that their hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.

2. A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost information, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California & then take the train to Hawaii ?"

3. I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Cape Town is in Massachusetts."

  • Work Jokes
  • travel jokes
  • Communication Jokes

Read more: Travel Agent Stories

The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #5037 - August 21, 2025

The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

tiny trains discoveredOur 12 year-old grandson's 2 week visit with us has come to an end - he might actually still be flying home on his red-eye flight while some of you are reading this. We had a very nice visit with him, A highlight of the last day was when Grandma Cybersalt's bike experienced a mechanical malfunction, resulting in her ending up on the ground at the local bike track. That may not sound like a "highlight" but other than a few scrapes and bruises (and needing a new helmet because it hit the ground pretty good instead of her head) she is OK. We are thankful the malfunction did not happen she was riding on the road there!

Today's video share is about a man who works for a railroad, bought a house, and found a railroad in his basement!
Click Here to Watch.

Enjoy the rest of today's digest!

~ Pastor Tim 



Military Wisdom

A black and white photo of military personnel lined up ready for inspection."A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
- Army's magazine of Preventive Maintenance.

"Aim towards the Enemy."
- Instruction printed on US Rocket Launcher

"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
- U.S. Marine Corps

"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
- U.S.A.F. Ammo Troop

"If the enemy is in range, so are you."
- Infantry Journal

"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."
- U.S. Air Force Manual

"Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons."
- Gen. MacArthur

"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo."
- Infantry Journal

"You, you, and you . . . Panic. The rest of you, come with me."
- U.S. Marine Corp Gunnery Sgt.

"Tracers work both ways."
- U.S. Army Ordnance

"Five second fuses only last three seconds."
- Infantry Journal

"Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last, and don't ever volunteer to do anything."
- U. S. Navy Swabbie

"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."
- David Hackworth

"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush."
- Infantry Journal

"No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection."
- Joe Gay

"Any ship can be a minesweeper... once."
- Anon

"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do."
- Unknown Marine Recruit

"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
- Your Buddies

"If you see a bomb technician running, follow him."
- U.S.A.F. Ammo Troop



One-Liner #1950

A black man in a pink and blue wide-striped shirt, one eyebrow raised.Parenthood turns you into a morning person the same way being chased by a bear makes you a runner.




Workplace Ethics

A bald man in striped shirt, tie and glasses looking directly at us."I fired the janitor for smoking pot."

"Why would you do that?"

"I don't like high maintenance people."



Quote #2386

Two sets of hands, fingers interlaced n prayer, at an outdoor table."Lord, when we are wrong, make us willing to change, and when we are right, make us easy to live with!"

- Dallas Willard - Hearing God



Laziness

A white car at a gas station refueling.The young woman sat in her stalled car, waiting for help. Finally two men walked up to her.

“I’m out of gas,” she purred. “Could you push me to the gas station?”

The men readily put their muscles to the car and rolled it several blocks.

After a while, one looked up, exhausted, to see that they had just passed a filling station.

“How come you didn’t turn in?” he yelled.

“Oh, I never go there,” the girl shouted back. “They don’t have full service.”


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Susan Page writes . . . . 

Take Time

A bouquet of yellow-orange roses against a black background.- photo by Susan PageSummer is the perfect season to think about the topic of time. Summertime is when we often “slow down to smell the roses.” It makes me think of the lyrics from the old hymn Take Time to Be Holy, particularly the second verse:

Take time to be holy; the world rushes on;
Spend much time in secret with Jesus alone.
By looking to Jesus, like Him thou shalt be
thy friends in thy conduct His likeness shall see.

Author: William D. Longstaff (ca. 1882)

Many of us can relate to the words “the world rushes on.”

Read more

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

  1. New Slogans for Federal Agencies
  2. Workplace Ethics
  3. One-Liner #1950
  4. Military Wisdom

Subcategories

Clean Jokes Article Count:  3626

Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you?  Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4687
 

  

Christmas Jokes Article Count:  77

a picture of christmas ballsWe think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.

If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!

Your Turn to Be Funny Article Count:  3

It's your turn to be funny.  Submit your funny caption today.

Funny Elephant Pictures Article Count:  16

Are you looking for funny elephant pictures?  You've come to the right place!

Cybersalt Digest Archive Article Count:  1572

Games Article Count:  15

Here are the games we have on the site so far.  There aren't many but they're loads of fun.

Funny Pictures Article Count:  679

Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow.  We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often.  Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.

Funny Car Pictures Article Count:  169

Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.

Funny Cat Pictures Article Count:  231

catmelonhead150x127.jpgOver the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.

And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.

  

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4687

 

 

 

Funny Dog Pictures Article Count:  149

dog_maggie.jpgSome say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.

It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.

Funny Horse Pictures Article Count:  24

Here's our funny horse pictures collection.

Funny Christmas Pictures Article Count:  53

christmas cakeWe think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.

We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.

Merry Christmas!

Pearly Gates Jokes Article Count:  544

Here are some clean, theologically incorrect jokes.  Most of them have been featured in the PearlyGates section of the free Cybersalt Digest Newsletter - which you can subscribe to by clicking here.

FunBlog Article Count:  533

When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here.  If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!

Cartoons Article Count:  3119

These are some of our favorite cartoons.

Backpew Article Count:  2944

Clean Puns Article Count:  1994

Our collection of puns.

 

ss secret

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.
ss mothers day

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim
This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.
ss tire ski jump

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4687

 

Funny Signs Article Count:  167

Our collection of funny signs.

One-liners Article Count:  2049

A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!

Chicken Humor Article Count:  1

Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart! 

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