I was going to quit all my bad habits for the new year, but then I remembered that nobody likes a quitter.
What's the biggest danger of building a snow dog rather than a snowman?
Frostbite!
Issue #4415
Last-Sunday-of-the-year greetings everyone!
If you have every wondered what the home office/studio is like here at Cybersalt World Headquarters, I invite you to watch this special behind the scenes tour I gave on a recent live stream. One of the things my regular viewers really wanted to see was some tech I have that I bet you don't have in your house!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=xs1722F_oNc
Like many of us, Rev. James Snyder doesn't always have a an easy time coming up with a New Year's Resolution. You can read "Items Not on My New Year's Resolution List" at:
www.cybersalt.org/gods-penman/items-not-on-my-new-years-resolution-list
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
"Thanks for the harmonica you gave me for Christmas," Little Johnny said to his Uncle Rodney, the first time he saw him after the holidays. "It's the best Christmas present I ever got."
"That's great," said his Uncle Rodney. "Do you know how to play it?"
"Oh, I don't play it," Little Johnny said.
"My mom gives me a dollar a day not to play it during the day and my dad gives me five dollars a week not to play it at night."
"I'm so pun at farties!"
- Major Mark W.
One of the North Pole Toy Shop employees just up and quit after last season and moved to New York City. She has a new position with the Philharmonic.
Now she is a Metro Gnome.
"Each New Year, we have before us a brand new book containing 365 blank pages with all the forgotten things from last year - the words we forgot to say, the love we forgot to show, and the charity we forgot to offer."
- Peggy Toney Horton
Today's Illustration
Flying to San Francisco from San Diego the other day, a passenger noticed that the "Fasten Seat Belts" sign was kept lit during the whole journey although the flight was a particularly smooth one.
Just before landing, he asked the flight attendant about it.
"Well," she explained, "up front there are 17 University of San Diego girls going to San Francisco for the weekend. In back, there are 25 Navy recruits out on weekend liberty...
"What would you do?"
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
"Thanks for the harmonica you gave me for Christmas," Little Johnny said to his Uncle Rodney, the first time he saw him after the holidays. "It's the best Christmas present I ever got."
"That's great," said his Uncle Rodney. "Do you know how to play it?"
"Oh, I don't play it," Little Johnny said.
"My mom gives me a dollar a day not to play it during the day and my dad gives me five dollars a week not to play it at night."
"I'm so pun at farties!"
- Major Mark W.
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
