The Top 14 Songs Performed by the DEA Choir (Drug Enforcement Agency)
Amazing Grass
Some astronauts wanted to have a New year's party on the moon, but they didn't planet in time.
The biggest reason to stay up until midnight on December 31 is to make sure 2022 leaves.
'Twas the night before Christmas and all around my hips
Were Fanny May candies that sneaked past my lips.
Fudge brownies were stored in the freezer with care
In hopes that my thighs would forget they were there.
While Mama in her girdle and I in chin straps
Had just settled down to sugar-borne naps.
When out in the pantry there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.
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Christmas Sunday greetings, everyone!
Two years ago Grandma Cybersalt and I spent Christmas alone together because the world was sick with COVID. This Christmas we're doing the same because we are both sick with a bug we picked up last week.
Yes, it's a bummer but celebrating the birth of Jesus, come to save us from the price of our sins, is so much bigger than the most perfect Christmas one might ever actually pull off with good health, that having an imperfect one isn't much further down from the mark!
Today's video share (Carol of the Bells) is another piece of Christmas music I enjoyed discovering this year.
Click here to watch the video.
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.
~ Pastor Tim
A kindly 90-year-old grandmother found buying presents for family and friends a bit much one Christmas, so she wrote out checks for all of them to put in their Christmas cards.
In each card she wrote, "Buy your own present" and then sent them off.
After the Christmas festivities were over, she found the checks in her desk!
Everyone had gotten a Christmas card from her with "Buy your own present" written inside, but without the checks!
Remember children, the best way to get a puppy for Christmas is to beg for a baby brother.
"Be a Billionaire!"
and Help
Refugees and
Persecuted Christians
Dachshund through the snow!
Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,
“Glory to God in the highest heaven,
and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”
When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”
- Luke's Gospel
A message delivered to Houston's First Baptist Church on Sunday, Dec 24th, 2000
I was asked to share with you what Christmas means to me. In order to do that, I will begin with a brief history of my personal journey out of Hong Kong followed by four applications of what Christmas means to me as a result of that background. I pray this message will bless you in a special way.
I was born in the city of Hong Kong. I went to a mission school and accepted Jesus for the salvation of my soul at a young age. I remember going to the chapel every day at the age of 10, talking to God, longing to have more of Him but not knowing then that God reveals Himself in the Bible and that the only way to know God better was through studying His Word.
My mother was a humble woman. In many ways, all she had was God. As early as I can remember, I recall my mother's prayers and how she begged God to protect her children and to deliver our family to political freedom in the land of America.
My parent's petition to come to this country was denied. My siblings and I were granted exit visas because we had won full scholarships to American Universities.
My brother was the first to leave. Shortly before my sister and I were scheduled to leave, my mother became very depressed and I woke up one morning to find that she had taken her own life.
In the summer of 1974, at the age of 17, I remember boarding that plane for the United States with all my belongings in two suitcases. I waved goodbye to my Dad and felt my heart being ripped out as I watched him standing by the gate all alone, knowing that he would be returning to an empty house.
My only consolation was to think that he would come visit at Christmas and we would be united for a little while.
As the plane lifted off from the land in which I was born, I wrapped my arms around myself imagining it to be the arms of God, begging God to walk with me into my future. When I set foot on the free land of America, I was filled with euphoria at having reached the dream that began in my mother's heart. At the same time, I was filled with a grief that no words could describe.
[gbrl]On the outside, I appeared as if I had my act together. On the inside, I was like a drowning man grasping for straws because I was living on the fumes of my mother's memory and it is so hard to live a dream you dreamed together, when the person you dreamed the dream with is no longer with you.
I found myself asking, "What am I supposed to want to be?"
My father came to see me the Christmas after I left Hong Kong and I remember counting the days till his arrival. I learned that all the Christmas gifts under the tree could not compare to the gift of spending that week with my Dad. It was a sad day when I had to take my Dad back to the airport to board the plane for Hong Kong.
For years, I struggled with defining myself. I plunged into my academics, I got married, I was on a fast and furious track up the corporate ladder. I had my first son. Then I heard God's voice as clearly as if He were standing in this room and He said, "Follow Me!" I tried to negotiate but God had spoken. So I found myself leaving my corporate career to follow God to the land that He would show me.
While I was at home, I tried to transfer my corporate skills to managing the household. I thought, "How hard could this be?" So, I kept logs and logs of data on my baby. I recorded when he woke and when he slept. I recorded every bowel movement and I proceeded to plot that data in a chart on my computer, thinking there was some kind of pattern to this baby, not knowing then that babies have no pattern and once you figure it out, they'll change it on you.
It was while I was home with my sons, born nineteen months apart, that I was reading them a book by Carla Dijs titled, "Are you my Mommy?" The book is about a little chick that lost its way and goes around asking everyone, "Are you my Mommy?" The cat said, "No. I have fur and I like to pur."
The rabbit said, "No. I have ears and I like to hop." As I was reading this to my children, God opened my eyes to see that I had been trying to find her in all the faces that I met. Have you ever looked for a relationship in all the faces that you meet? The Lord met my need by bringing me to 2 Corinthians 5:17, "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation…"
To my question, "Are you my Mommy?" the Lord Jesus said, "Yes, I am!"
Christmas to me means "Jesus came for me." My Mom was my best friend.
We dreamed of reaching the promised land of America together. We said that no matter how difficult things got, we would be all right because we had each other. When I woke up to find that she had taken her own life, all I could think of was, "You left. You promised you would never leave without me. But you left." Sometimes, people make promises they don't keep. Sometimes, they make promises they can't keep. But God taught me that I am not a victim of choices other people make. Though all abandon me, the Lord will take me up in His arms. Jesus came for me.
After my mother's funeral, I was packing up her belongings and found a biscuit box she had hidden. When I opened it, I found the last gift she gave me. It was diamonds she had invested in, with a note that said they were for my future in the United States and I was to sell them if I ever needed money.
I still have those pieces today. As sweet and meaningful as that gift was, I found it could not carry me through my life. My need was more than financial. Christmas to me means "God sent me Jesus because Jesus is the answer to all that I need." Jesus said in John 7:38, "Whoever believes in me, streams of living water will flow from within him." God is my dream maker. He is not a memory. I don't have to live on fumes. He lives in me and He is the gift that keeps on giving. My past cannot imprison me or limit me. Jesus is my lifeline and an unending source of power for my life.
The question is, "Do I believe it and will I receive it?"
Every chapter must have an end before a new chapter can begin. This was how the story with my mother ended: When I was a little girl, I promised my Mom I would get her out of Hong Kong before the Communist takeover.
Therefore, before Hong Kong returned to Communist China in 1997, I sent for my mother's ashes. For years, I dreaded the moment I would hold that urn in my hands, projecting that I would be thinking, "This wasn't the way I expected to bring her out." I remember sitting in my living room, unwrapping the brown padded parcel a friend had hand carried to me. In it was a white marble urn with the gold etched inscription of her name and the words, "Rest in Peace" To my surprise, when I pulled her urn close to me, I had a song in my heart and I was filled with praise over a God who, in His grace, remembered the prayers of a mother to protect her children, though she was not here to see it. Though she lost hope, God remained faithful. And I saw how God lowered His hand from heaven to handraise my mother's children for Himself so that all of us are not only politically free but we are spiritually free. To me, Christmas is God intercepting human history to give me His Son to take my suffering and to exchange it for His victory song.
Six months ago, my Dad and my step-mom moved to Houston, Texas. After 25 years, we are finally united. My brother and my sister and their families flew into Houston for Christmas and they are here this morning. We will be celebrating Christmas together and when the celebration is over, I won't have to take my Dad back to the airport. It took 25 years before God brought my Dad to Houston because God had to wean me off the dream that began in my mother's heart to give me His dream for me. It was after I was certain of my calling that it was then safe for God to unite me with my biological family.
For I was created by Him and for Him. In Galatians 4:4, God's Word said, "…when the time had fully come, God sent His Son…" Christmas to me means God will fulfill His purpose in His perfect timing.
In summary, to me:
This Christmas, I pray you will experience Christmas for all God meant it to be.
- by Anita Grace Lie Carman (Anitabible@aol.com)
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . .
Around this time of the year, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and I revel in our family memories.
Unlike me, she has some wonderful memories because of her large family. I came from a very small family and therefore don't have that many memories let alone wonderful memories.
This reminded me of my first encounter with what my parents called Santa Claus.
Read moreThe Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
