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Cybersalt News

Oh Look Chicken Thursday!

I pastored local churches for 28 years and in that time I never saw a sheep as woolly as the sheep in today's video share!
Click Here to watch the video.

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.

~ Pastor Tim 

"Hello, hello?" shrilled a spinsterish voice over the phone. "Is this the SPCA?"

"Yes."

"I want you to send somebody over right away."

"What's wrong?"

"There's a horrid magazine salesman sitting in a tree teasing my dog."

Always order two coffees ... to make your second donut look like it's for someone else. 

"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

A famous treasure hunter went out one day with all of his diving gear to search for a treasure box that was supposed to be on a sunken ship. He swam around for a while and looked where it was supposed to be, but didn't find anything.

When he was walking out of the water, really close to the shore, he tripped on something. He started to dig around it and it was the treasure chest he was looking for.

All this goes to prove that booty is only shin deep!

My little brother just asked, "Why are people so nice to the people who are about to die?"

And I told him that we want to make their last few moments on earth happy.

And he said, "Everyone dies a little everyday and sometimes we don't know when a person is gonna die, so why isn't everyone always nice, because we never know what's gonna happen to someone."

As we stood in formation at the Pensacola Naval Air Station, our Flight Instructor said, "All right! All you idiots fall out."

As the rest of the squad wandered away, I remained at attention.

The Instructor walked over until he was eye-to-eye with me, and then just raised a single eyebrow.

I smiled and said, "Sure was a lot of 'em, huh sir?"

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

If you ever spent more than five minutes with me, you would conclude that I do not know everything. I would agree 100%.

It is not bad that I don't know everything. I know today more than I knew ten years ago, if that is any consolation.

The thing that is surprising to me is that I do not know what I need to know when I need to know it.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

Click here to view this edition online!  

Cybersalt News

Oh Look Chicken Thursday!

I just noticed that the subject of last Sunday's mailing was [Cybersalt Digest] Issue #48500. Even Walter M. did not catch that one - or maybe he did and I just haven't read his email about it yet, lol.

I have always wanted to maintain a clean desk (even though some think it is a sign of a sick mind.) I am happy to report that my desk has been pretty tidy for weeks now. However, my goal of having a zero-inbox for my emails is getting farther and farther away! I wish my desk would share the secret to its success with discipline with my gmail account. Although, maybe it has already but it is lost amongst my other emails!

Today's video share is of a plane that is constantly flying as it flies higher and higher and higher!
Click Here to watch the video.

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.

~ Pastor Tim 

• The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
• The trees are whistling for the dogs.
• The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
• Hot water now comes out of both taps.
• You can make sun tea instantly.
• You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
• The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.
• You discover that in August it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.
• You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.
• You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
• You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.
• Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
• You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
• The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter, salt and pepper.
• Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs.
• The cows are giving evaporated milk.

Next time a stranger talks to you when you're alone, just look at them shocked and whisper, "You can see me?"

"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.

"The price good men pay for indifference to public affairs is to be ruled by evil men."

- Plato

Two friends and I ordered sandwiches in a local joint.

I wanted hot sauce, Jim wanted medium and Bob, mild.

When I asked for all three, the ornery waitress pointed to the squeeze bottle sitting in the middle of the table.

"We need three," I insisted. "Which one is this?"

"All of them," she replied. "You want hotter? Put more on."

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

Have you ever had the feeling that you've been hoodwinked? You can't point out the specifics, but something deep inside suggests you have been.

The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and I had a wonderful vacation at St. Augustine, one of our favorite places to go.

Something happened toward the end of our vacation that led me to suspect I was hoodwinked, but I couldn't unwind the situation yet.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

A dinner speaker was in such a hurry to get to his engagement that when he arrived and sat down at the head table, he suddenly realized that he had forgotten his false teeth. Turning to the man next to him, he complained, "I forgot my teeth, what am I going to do now!?"

The man said, "No problem." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair of false teeth. "Try these," he said.

The speaker tried them on. "Too loose," he said. The man then said, "I have another pair -- try these."

Next time a stranger talks to you when you're alone, just look at them shocked and whisper, "You can see me?"