Nothing personal against Seattleites - feel free to change it to any other place that gets a lot of rain.
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A newcomer to Seattle arrives on a rainy day. She gets up the next day and it's raining. It also rains the day after that, and the day after that. She goes out to lunch and sees a young kid and out of despair asks, "Hey, kid, does it ever stop raining around here?"
The kid says, "How should I know?
I'm only 6."
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"I can't believe it, " said the tourist. "I've been here an entire week and it's done nothing but rain. When do you have summer here?"
"Well, that's hard to say, " replied the local. "Last year, it was on a Wednesday."
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Q. What do you call two straight days of rain in Seattle?
A. A weekend
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What did the Seattle native say to the Pillsbury Doughboy?
"Nice tan."
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Did you know that Cinderella was a Seattle native?
Who else would need a fairy to get to the ball?
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Meteorological experts were predicting a gargantuan flood that would destroy the world.
The Pope went on worldwide TV and said, "This is punishment from God. Prepare to meet your Maker."
The President went on national TV and announced, "Our scientists have done all they can. The end is near."
The Seattle evening news came on and said, "Today's five day forecast-same as usual."
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What does daylight savings time mean in Seattle?
An extra hour of rain.
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It rains only twice a year in Seattle: August to April and May to July.