A mother's four-year-old daughter was attending her first performance of the Ice Capades. She was so mesmerized that she wouldn't budge from her seat even during intermission, watching the activity while the ice was cleaned.
At the end of the show, she exclaimed, "I know what I want to be when I grow up!"
The mother envisioned her on the ice in another 15 years, starring in the Ice Capades.
She was brought back to earth when the daughter continued, "I want to be a Zamboni driver!"
Have you ever seen a situation that could be best described as an accident waiting to happen? Well, here's a solution waiting for an accident to happen. Just how does one remove a cork that is inside a bottle? Here's how.
But first, let me ask this - am I missing something? Admittedly, I'm not a big drinker. Sure, first thing in the morning I have to have a drink of water right away, but that's the end of it. OK, you've got me. When I want to get really wild I put a bit of Sprite or 7-up in my apple juice!
But people! Is the cork falling to the bottom of a bottle the great unknown plague of humanity or is this just a ploy to trick people into buying more plastic bags?
Oh yeah, I also drink milk and tea - but I don't put milk in my tea. What a rebel I am!
An elderly woman walked into the local country church. The friendly usher greeted her at the door and helped her up the flight of steps.
"Where would you like to sit?" he asked politely.
"The front row please," she answered.
"You really don't want to do that," the usher said. "The pastor is really boring."
"Do you happen to know who I am?" the woman inquired.
"No," he said.
"I'm the pastor's mother," she replied indignantly.
"Do you know who I am?" he asked.
"No," she said.
"Good," he answered, "Let me show you the front pew."
I don't know what the policy in your workplace is regarding the modification of office equipment, but I bet that this guy would violate it.
I don't mean to be unkind, because I'm sure he's fun to work with (unless you are in the cubicle right next to him), but you would probably have to lock up all staplers, keyboards, pencil sharpeners and anything else that moves or else risk finding it as part of a coffee machine or photcopier modification.
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
