A small boy was pushing a gasoline-powered lawnmower down the street with a "For Sale" sign on it.
A man stopped him asked if the mower would run. The boy told him it would, so the man bought it.
A while later, the boy was walking past the man's house and saw him pulling repeatedly on the starting rope with no success.
Definitions:A reactionary is a man who wants to face the past with confidence.
Oh look, Chicken Thursday!
A few weeks back I preached at the church Susan and I have been attending since I retired from local church pastoring. You can listen to "The Very Thing" at:
gatewaybaptistchurch.ca/media/172783-631731-1715277/the-very-thing
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
An out-of-towner in New York at the height of the tourist season decided to revisit an uptown restaurant he'd enjoyed on a previous trip to the city.
Finally catching the eye of an overworked waiter, he said, "You know, it's been over five years since I first came in here."
"You'll have to wait your turn, sir," replied the busy waiter. "I can only serve one table at a time."
Definitions:A university is a community in which people make a living by taking in each other's brainwashing.
Yesterday I saw an ad that said,
Radio for sale
$1
Volume stuck on full
I thought, "I can't turn that down."
"Your wounds will either become walls of offense or windows of revelation depending on how you respond."
- Unknown
First, eventually, you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
Second, the older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Third, some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
Fourth, when you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
Fifth, you know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
Sixth, I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
Seventh, one of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.
Eighth, one must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.
Ninth, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
Yesterday I saw an ad that said,
Radio for sale
$1
Volume stuck on full
I thought, "I can't turn that down."
An out-of-towner in New York at the height of the tourist season decided to revisit an uptown restaurant he'd enjoyed on a previous trip to the city.
Finally catching the eye of an overworked waiter, he said, "You know, it's been over five years since I first came in here."
"You'll have to wait your turn, sir," replied the busy waiter. "I can only serve one table at a time."
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
