Not saying I'm old, but ... When I was in school, we made our parents ashtrays for Christmas.
The owner of a drug store walks in to find a guy leaning heavily against a wall.
The owner asks the clerk "What's with that guy over there by the wall?"
The clerk replies, "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for his cough. I couldn't find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle of laxative."
The owner screams, "You goober! You can't treat a cough with a bottle of laxatives!"
The clerk calmly replies, "Of course you can! Look at him; he's afraid to cough!"
10. Anne of Avonlea/Anne of Green Gables Collectors Edition with 74 minutes of extra footage
9. Any knick-knack
8. Tickets to the ballet
7. Another new tie
6. A Bath and Body Works Soap Basket
Read more: Top Ten Gifts Your Husband Doesn't Want For Christmas
Sunday greetings everyone!
Grandma Cybersalt and I enjoyed a nice Christmas party last night with other members of our church's worship team. Last year we missed the same party because of a huge traffic jam due to an accident on the highway and that memory of disappointment added to the gratefulness of this year. I am grateful God uses thankfulness to recycle memories of less than optimal things.
With the holidays upon us, today's video share may be a timely one for some, helping to make time spent with family and friends more enjoyable for you and for others.
Click Here to Watch
Enjoy the rest of today's Digest.
~ Pastor Tim
At church one Sunday Joe asked the pastor, "Would you pray for my hearing."
The pastor puts his hands on Joe's ears and enthusiastically prays.
When finished the pastor asks: "So how's your hearing?"
Joe says: "I don't know, it's not till next Monday."
I dance like people wish they weren't watching.
Will an underperforming scuba diver with chickenpox ever come up to scratch?
- from British Comedy Duo "The Two Ronnies" circa 1970s)
"Sometimes faith will make you look stupid ... until it starts to rain."
- Noah
This morning, on my way to work, I found myself behind a car with a handwritten sign taped to the back window:
“Learning stick. Sorry for any delay.”
Reading that, I instantly softened. I stayed patient through the slow shifts and jerky starts — and honestly, they were doing pretty well for someone still learning.
But then a thought hit me:
Would I have been just as patient if I hadn’t seen that sign?
Probably not.
And that realization stayed with me.
Because the truth is, most people don’t have signs explaining what they’re going through. You don’t see:
“Going through a divorce.”
“Lost a child.”
“Feeling depressed.”
“Just diagnosed with cancer.”
If people wore their struggles where we could see them, we’d move through the world with so much more gentleness.
But the truth is — we shouldn’t need a sign to show kindness.
Everyone you meet is carrying something invisible, something heavy.
So today, and every day, let’s choose patience.
Let’s choose grace.
Let’s choose love — even when there’s no sign telling us to.
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . .
What I enjoy the most about holidays is the “eating frenzy.” It gives me opportunity to get away with a lot behind The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage’s back, which is a great challenge. I’m not always successful, but I try and I have my family to thank for that.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
I dance like people wish they weren't watching.
Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!
It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.
Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.
Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.
It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.
Here's our funny horse pictures collection.
We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.
We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.
Merry Christmas!
When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!
Our collection of puns.
Our collection of funny signs.
A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!
Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!
