Entertainment

As I was dropping my son off at daycare the other day, I overheard some of the children talking about their siblings.

"My brother takes karate lessons," bragged one.

"My sister takes gymnastics," said another.

Not to be outdone, the youngest piped up, "My sister takes antibiotics!"

Man injured by fallen raccoon

A couple of goobers in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard.  One goober walked in the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos."

The clerk said, "You mean two-by-fours, don't you?"

The man said, "I'll go check," and went back to the truck.  He returned a minute later and said, "Yeah, I meant two-by-fours."

"Alright.  How long do you need them?"

The customer paused for a minute and said, "I'd better go check."

After awhile, the customer returned to the office and said, "A long time.  We're gonna build a house."

The Chaplain had been assigned to the ship and he noticed how much grief the cooks (Mess Specialists) caught from the crew and how they gave back as much as they got. He talked to the Food Service Officer and decided to talk to the cooks and get them to be more cheerful when they served the meals to the sailors coming down the line. A smile and a cheerful comment, a willingness to serve them will reap great benefits he told them.

After his pep talk the Food Service Officer and the Chaplain stood back and watched the food being served.

A new sailor aboard walked down the line but he didn't like anything he saw so he just carried his tray down the line till he got to the dessert section. He picked up a saucer containing a large piece of chocolate cake.

The Mess Specialist looked at him, "Is that all you're gonna eat," he asked.

The sailor said, "Yeah, the rest of it don't look too appetizing."

The Mess Specialist smiled and said, "Well, in that case would you like two pieces of cake?"

The Chaplain smiled and hit the Food Service Officer in the ribs, "I told you my talk did them some good."

The kid said, "Yeah, man, I'd appreciate it."

The cook leaned over and cut the piece of cake on the tray in half.

MILLEDGEVILLE, Ga.  (AP) - Brad Davis was training his puppy to pick up the scent of a treed raccoon when his colleague, Donnie Lamb, decided to shoot the raccoon out of the tree.  Trouble was, Davis was standing underneath it.

The 15-pound animal fell 60 feet onto his head, knocking him out and fracturing three vertebrae Dec.  17.  "I heard him shoot, and the next thing I knew, I was seeing lights shining in my eyes," said Davis, 27.

For Christmas, he got a hard hat, a raccoon cap and plenty of teasing.  "People have been picking at me bad," he said.  "A friend called me last night to go coon hunting and said I could sit in the truck and just listen to the dogs."