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Duh, I need a lawyer.

International incidents involving China should now decrease.

They're not parked - they're resting.

S.C.U.T.R. - The latest tool in the army's arsenal of weapons.

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Issue #3768

Cybersalt News

The newest addition to the FunBlog is a train video. The people look like sardines, but the location is not Sardinia. You'll find "Efficient Public Transportation" at:
www.cybersalt.org/funblog/efficient-public-transportation

Enjoy the rest of todays mailing.

Here is today's CleanLaugh

Matchmaker

Barbie, a waitress, decided to put her matchmaking skills to the test with our mutual friend Mike. She figured that Sandy, another customer who seemed to have much in common with Mike, would be an ideal date.

One day Mike came into the restaurant when Sandy was also there. Barbie dragged Mike over to Sandy's table and introduced the two. Then she watched, in amazement, as Mike put his arm around the young woman and said in his best mock-seductive voice, "Hellooooh, Sandy."

"You guys know each other?" Barbie asked.

"We sure do," said Mike. "She's my sister."

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Here is today's One-liner

One-liner #0741

"Some days I wake up grouchy and other days I let him sleep in."

Here is today's CleanPun

Top Shelf Detergent

"A woman who puts detergent on the top shelf jumps for Joy."

Here is today's CleanQuote

Quote #1194

"My life is based on a true story."

Here is today's Illustration

The Quitter

"The Quitter"

Fate handed the quitter a bump, and he dropped;
The road seemed too rough to go, so he stopped.
He thought of his hurt, and there came to his mind
The easier path he was leaving behind.

Oh, it's all much too hard, said the quitter right then;
I'll stop where I am and not try it again.
He sat by the road and he made up his tale
To tell when men asked why he happened to fail.

A thousand excuses flew up to his tongue,
And these on the thread of his story he strung,
But the truth of the matter he didn't admit;
He never once said, I was frightened and quit.

Whenever the quitter sits down by the road
And drops from the struggle to lighten his load,
He can always recall to his own peace of mind
A string of excuses for falling behind;

But somehow or other he can't think of one
Good reason for battling and going right on.
Oh, when the bump comes and fate hands you a jar,
Don't baby yourself, boy, whoever you are;

Don't pity yourself and talk over your woes;
Don't think up excuses for dodging the blows.
But stick to the battle and see the thing through.
And don't be a quitter, whatever you do.

- Edgar A. Guest

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt

www.cybersalt.org

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Subcategories

Clean Jokes Article Count: 3626

Each day, enjoy a CleanLaugh here. Want the latest clean jokes e-mailed directly to you? Subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest at www.cybersaltlists.org.

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim

This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim

This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4653

Christmas Jokes Article Count: 77

We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.

If you've got a Christmas joke we don't yet have, please send it to us so we can add to the collection!

Your Turn to Be Funny Article Count: 3

It's your turn to be funny. Submit your funny caption today.

Funny Elephant Pictures Article Count: 16

Are you looking for funny elephant pictures? You've come to the right place!

Cybersalt Digest Archive Article Count: 1559

Games Article Count: 15

Here are the games we have on the site so far. There aren't many but they're loads of fun.

Funny Pictures Article Count: 679

Cybersalt's funny pictures collection has been years in the making and continues to grow. We are also in the process of moving images over from our old site so check back often. Don't forget to check out our funny cat pictures, funny dog pictures, funny elephant pictures, and take your turn to be funny.

Funny Car Pictures Article Count: 169

Here's where we keep our funny car pictures.

Funny Cat Pictures Article Count: 231

Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.

And so, whether you are a cat lover or tolerator, we hope you enjoy these funny cat pictures. And, of course, if you have any funny cat pictures you want to share with the world, feel free to send them to us to post here.

The Best Kept Secret Ever!

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim

This husband and wife decided to have some fun and surprise all their friends and family with the big news of not just gender, but having twins.

An Open Letter to Moms from Kid President

July 06, 2015 Entertainment Pastor Tim

This one goes out to moms! Spoken by someone who knows.

Tire Ski Jump

Jun 29, 2015 Hits: 4653

Funny Dog Pictures Article Count: 149

Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the Funny Cat Archive. For the dog people we have this Funny Dog Pictures archive.

It's dedicated to the memory of Maggie - Pastor Tim and family's dog. The SPCA rescued Maggie from Manitoba's Red River flood in 1996 and brought her to British Columbia where she had two short term owners before becoming a part of the Davis household where she preferred adults over kids, picked and ate fruit from trees in the backyard, and very rarely went into water at the beach.

Funny Horse Pictures Article Count: 24

Here's our funny horse pictures collection.

Funny Christmas Pictures Article Count: 53

christmas cake We think Cybersalt's Funny Christmas Pictures Collection is the best on the net.

We hope you'll enjoy each one and share them with your online family and friends.

Merry Christmas!

Pearly Gates Jokes Article Count: 544

Here are some clean, theologically incorrect jokes. Most of them have been featured in the PearlyGates section of the free Cybersalt Digest Newsletter - which you can subscribe to by clicking here.

FunBlog Article Count: 533

When Pastor Tim finds (or puts) fun things on the net, he posts them here. If you would like to be updated when new things are added, just subscribe to the Cybersalt Digest Newsletter. Enjoy!

Cartoons Article Count: 3119

These are some of our favorite cartoons.

Backpew Article Count: 2944

Clean Puns Article Count: 1994

Our collection of puns.

Funny Signs Article Count: 167

Our collection of funny signs.

One-liners Article Count: 2044

A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!

Chicken Humor Article Count: 1

Chickens have grown to have a special place in Cybersalt's heart!

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