Cybersalt News
Sunday greetings everyone - and happy September!
Recently, Rev. James Snyder got a chuckle when his wife took a turn forgetting something. You can read "A Key On the Table Is Worth Many A Chuckle" at:
www.cybersalt.org/gods-penman/a-key-on-the-table-is-worth-many-a-chuckle
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Vet Come Back
Dr. Cutter is the local veterinarian in Kennebec County, Maine. He was well-known in town for his wry humor. He surpassed himself one summer day when a city dog was brought to him after an encounter with a porcupine.
After almost an hour of prying, pulling, cutting and stitching, he returned the dog to its owner, who asked what she owed.
"A hundred and fifty dollars, Ma'am," he answered.
"Why that's simply outrageous!" she stormed. "That's what's wrong with you Maine people, you're always trying to over charge summer visitors. Whatever do you do in the winter, when we're not being gypped here?"
"We raise porcupines, Ma'am."
Today's One Liner
One-Liner #1410
Self-Annihilating Description
He knew everything, but that's all.
Today's Clean Pun
Clown Soup
If you boil a funny bone it becomes a laughing stock.
That's humerus.
Today's Quote
Quote #1851
"... all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."
- Psalm 139:16b (NIV)
Today's Illustration
Don't Go To Bed
I've heard it said don't go to bed
while hanging on to sorrow,
you may not have the chance to laugh
with those you love tomorrow.
You may not mean the words you speak
when anger takes its toll,
you may regret your actions
once you've lost your self control.
When you've lost your temper
and you've said some hurtful things,
think about the heartache
that your actions sometime bring.
You'll never get those moments back,
such precious time to waste,
and all because of things you said
in anger and in haste.
So if you're loving someone
and your pride has settled in,
you may not ever have the chance
to say to them again...
"I love you and I miss you
and although we don't agree,
I'll try to see your point of view,
please do the same for me."
- Author Unknown
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
Part of my job as a public-health nurse is teaching new parents how to care for their infants.
Self-Annihilating Descriptions
I saw a sign that said, "Falling Rocks!"
Three little boys were bragging about how tough they were."I'm so tough", said the first boy, "that I can wear out a pair of shoes in a week."
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the 