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As one of relatively few female airline pilots, I've often been mistaken for a flight attendant, ticket agent or even a snack bar employee. Occasionally people will see me in uniform and ask if I'm a "real" pilot. Still others congratulate me for making it in a male-dominated field.

One day, I was in the restroom before a flight. I was at the sink, brushing my teeth, when a woman walked through the door and looked over at me. “My sister would be so proud of you!" she remarked.

I figured her sister must also be in the airline business, so I smiled and asked why.

Replied the woman, "She's a dentist."

You Know You're Really A Mom When . . .

1.  You count the sprinkles on each kid's cupcake to make sure they're equal.

2.  You want to take out a contract on the kid who broke your child's favorite toy and made him/her cry.

3.  You have time to shave only one leg at a time.

4.  You hide in the bathroom to be alone.

5.  Your child throws up and you catch it.

6.  Someone else's kid throws up at a party and you keep eating.

7.  You consider finger paint to be a controlled substance.

8.  You mastered the art of placing food on a plate without anything touching.

9.  Your child insists that you read "Once Upon a Potty" out loud in the lobby of the doctor's office, and you do it.

10.  You hire a sitter because you haven't been out with your husband in ages, then spend half the night talking about and checking on the kids.

11.  You hope ketchup is a vegetable because it's the only one your child eats.

12.  You can't bear the thought of your son's first girlfriend.

13.  You hate the thought of his wife even more.

14.  You find yourself cutting your husband's sandwiches into unusual shapes.

15.  You fast-forward through the scene when the hunter shoots Bambi's mother.

16.  You obsess when your child clings to you upon parting during his first month at school, then obsess when he skips in without looking back the second time.

17.  You can't bear to give away baby clothes--it's so final.

18.  You hear your mother's voice coming out of your mouth when you say, "Not in your good clothes."

19.  You stop criticizing the way your mother raised you.

20.  You read that the average five-year-old asks 437 questions a day and feel proud that your kid is "above average."

21.  You say at least once a day, "I'm not cut out for this job," but you know you wouldn't trade it for anything.

Three little boys were bragging about how tough they were.

"I'm so tough", said the first boy, "that I can wear out a pair of shoes in a week".

"Well", said the second little boy, "I'm so tough, I can wear out a pair of jeans in a day".

"That's nothing", said the third boy. "When my parents take me to see my grandma and grandpa, I can wear them out in just one hour."

Stopping to pick up my daughter at kindergarten, I found out that the topic of show and tell that day had been parents' occupations. The teacher pulled me aside. Whispering, she advised, "You might want to explain a little bit more to your daughter what you do for a living."

I work as a training consultant and often conduct my seminars in motel conference rooms.

When I asked why, the teacher explained, "Your daughter told the class she wasn't sure what you did, but said you got dressed real pretty and went to work at motels."