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In Today's Issue
     ÂCybersalt News
Oh look, Chicken Thursday! There is even a new chicken themed funny car picture on the Cybersalt site today. You will find "Coop Car" at:
http://www.cybersalt.org/funny-car-pictures/coop-car
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.
   ÂToday's CleanLaugh
Things You Would Never Know Without the Movies
*Things You Would Never Know Without the Movies*
- It is always possible to park directly outside any building you are visiting.
- A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
- If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.
- Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.
- It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
- When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, they will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.
- No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.
- Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
- When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other. If they're villains, they will probably speak with an English accent.
- You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.
- Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds, unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.
- An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight-year-old child.
- Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at that precise moment you turn the television on.
Today's One-liner
One-liner #0973
I'm allergic to food – I break out in fat.
Today's Clean Pun
Cookie Cutter House
"I just don't want to live in a cookie cutter house."
- Gingerbread family
Today's Quote
Quote #1421
"The grass isn't greener on the other side. It's greener where you water it."
- @freesermons
Today's Illustration
Inheritances
Jack has died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Jack's Last Will and Testament.
"To my dear wife Esther, I leave the house, 50 acres of land, and 1 million dollars."
"To my son Barry, I leave my Big Lexus and the Jaguar."
"To my daughter Suzy, I leave my yacht and $250,000."
"And to my brother-in-law Jeff, who always insisted that health is better than wealth, I leave my sun lamp."
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
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Little Johnny stared at his test paper.
If ceiling fans could hold your weight, you'd never be bored again.
By the time the wedding planner finally bothered to order the flowers there were none left. 
"For every mile of road there's two miles of ditch."
The cowboy walked into the tack shop. "How much for a pair of spurs?" he asked the sales clerk.
A little girl was talking to her teacher about Jonah being swallowed by a great fish. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a fish to swallow a human because even though they were large their throat was very small.
We think Cybersalt's collection of Christmas jokes is the best collection on the net. Right now it features over 70 jokes.
Over the years, some of the most popular pages on the Cybersalt site have featured Funny Cat Pictures. We have to admit that even though cats often look at humans like they owe the feline world something (remember dogs have owners and cats have staff), cats aren't as bad as a lot of the press that they get.
Some say the world can be divided into two types - cat people and dog people. For the cat people of the planet, Cybersalt has the 