Cybersalt News

Dogs may be man's best friend, but they aren't always man's best helper.
http://www.cybersalt.org/funny-dog-pictures/7663

Enjoy the rest of today's digest.

Here is today's CleanLaugh - "Yosemite Bears"

A married couple was vacationing in Yosemite. The wife expressed her concern about camping because of bears and said she would feel more comfortable in a motel. The husband said that he'd like to camp. To calm her concerns, he suggested they talk to the park ranger to see what the likelihood of a bear encounter would be.

The ranger told them, "Well, we haven't seen any grizzlies in this area so far this year, or black bears, for that matter."

The wife shrieked, "There are TWO types of bears out here? How can you tell the difference? Which one is more dangerous?"

The ranger replied, "Well, that's easy -- see, if the bear chases you up a tree and it comes up after you, it's a BLACK bear. If it SHAKES the tree until you fall out, it's a grizzly."

The motel room was quite nice.

Today's CleanPun

The problem: There's a box with a hole at each end, and there's a rabbit in the box. The rabbit sticks his head out of the hole in one end, and a minute later he sticks it out the other end. Half a minute later, his head appears at the opposite end, a fourth of a minute later it appears at the end opposite to that one, an eighth of a minute later, etc., etc. How long will it take before the rabbit sticks its head out of both ends of the box at the same time?

In theory, two minutes.

In practice, no answer is possible unless you split hares.

Today's One Liner

“Don't bother me; I'm living happily ever after.”

Today's CleanQuote

"A good listener is usually thinking about something else."
~Kin Hubbard

Today's Illustration - "Life Changes"

Featured Illustration items are well suited for introducing or illuminating a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

I dialed a number and got the following recording:

"I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to call. I am making some changes in my life. Please leave a message after the beep. If I do not return your call, you are one of the changes."

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.

Pastor Tim pastored at Westside Bible Church, Victoria, British Columbia from November 1996 to October 2017.

A married couple was vacationing in Yosemite. The wife expressed her concern about camping because of bears and said she would feel more comfortable in a motel. The husband said that he'd like to camp. To calm her concerns, he suggested they talk to the park ranger to see what the likelihood of a bear encounter would be.

The ranger told them, "Well, we haven't seen any grizzlies in this area so far this year, or black bears, for that matter."

The wife shrieked, "There are TWO types of bears out here? How can you tell the difference? Which one is more dangerous?"

The ranger replied, "Well, that's easy -- see, if the bear chases you up a tree and it comes up after you, it's a BLACK bear. If it SHAKES the tree until you fall out, it's a grizzly."

The motel room was quite nice.

Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings everyone.

The audio recording of my message from last weekend has been uploaded to the Westside Bible Church website. You fill find "Ask for Wisdom" at:
http://www.westsidefamily.org/messages

Enjoy the rest of today's digest.

Here is today's CleanLaugh - "New Librarian"

The new librarian decided that instead of checking out children's books by writing the names of borrowers on the book cards herself, she would have the youngsters sign their own names. She would then tell them they were signing a "contract" for returning the books on time.

Her first customer was a 2nd grader, who looked surprised to see a new librarian. He brought four books to the desk and shoved them across to the librarian, giving her his name as was the custom.

The new librarian pushed the books back, smiled, and told him to sign them out. The boy carefully printed his name on each book card and then handed them to her with a look of utter disgust. Before the new librarian could even start her speech he said scornfully, "At least that other librarian we had could write."

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.

Pastor Tim pastored at Westside Bible Church, Victoria, British Columbia from November 1996 to October 2017.

Man's best friend - not best helper.