For a while my husband and I had opposite schedules.

He worked during the day, and I worked at night.

One morning I noticed he had left a note to himself on the kitchen counter that read, "STAMPS!"

As a helpful surprise, I bought him some at the post office and put them on the counter before going to work.

The next morning I found the same note.

"STAMPS!" was crossed out.

Underneath it he had written, "ONE MILLION DOLLARS!"

One night at an economy motel, I ordered a 6:00 a.m. wake-up call.

The next morning, I awoke before 6:00, but the phone did not ring until 6:30.

"Good morning," a young man said sheepishly. "This is your wake-up call."

Annoyed, I let the motel worker have it.

"You were supposed to call me at 6:00 AM!" I complained. "What if I had a million-dollar deal to close this morning, and your oversight made me miss out on it?"

"Well, sir," the desk clerk quickly replied, "if you had a million-dollar deal to close, you probably wouldn't be staying in this motel!"

 In Today's Issue

Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings everyone!

I know many of you enjoy when I post recordings or videos of baptisms at the church where I pastor. Well, last week we had a baptism so this week there is a video to watch. You can see Sandy Phelps' baptism at:
www.westsidefamily.org/baptisms/baptismal-service-january-11-2015

I also know that many of you really like the cat videos I put on the Cybersalt site. Well, last week I featured 2 cat videos at the beginning of my message. Before you think I've gone totally off my rocker, why not watch them both AND listen to the lesson about God that I think they illustrate? After that, you can always still line up with everyone who thinks I'm crazy - though let me tell you it's getting to be a long walk to where that line forms in the back!
www.westsidefamily.org/messages/the-youcerto

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.

Economy Motel

One night at an economy motel, I ordered a 6:00 a.m. wake-up call.

The next morning, I awoke before 6:00, but the phone did not ring until 6:30.

"Good morning," a young man said sheepishly. "This is your wake-up call."

Annoyed, I let the motel worker have it.

"You were supposed to call me at 6:00 AM!" I complained. "What if I had a million-dollar deal to close this morning, and your oversight made me miss out on it?"

"Well, sir," the desk clerk quickly replied, "if you had a million-dollar deal to close, you probably wouldn't be staying in this motel!"

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.

 In Today's Issue

Cybersalt News

There is a new funny sign picture on the Cybersalt site today.  You will find "Old Signs?" at:
www.cybersalt.org/a4wa

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!

Letter From Mom

When the man came home, his wife was crying.

"Your mother insulted me," she sobbed.

"My mother? How could she do that when she is on vacation on the other side of the world?" the man asked.

"I know. But this morning a letter addressed to you and marked private arrived. I opened it because I was curious."

"And?"

"At the end of the letter it was written: PS. Dear Diane, when you have finished reading this letter, don't forget to give it to my son."

One-liner #0969

Auto-correct has become my worst enema.

Spider-Man

If you'd like to learn how to spin like Spider-Man make sure to sign up for his new webinar.

Quote #1417

"Three wolves and one sheep voting on what to have for supper demonstrates the downside of democracy."

Some Things You Keep

Some things you keep. Like good teeth. Warm coats. Bald husbands & chubby wives. They're good for you, reliable and practical and so sublime that to throw them away would make the garbage man a thief. So you hang on to the older gifts, because something old is sometimes better than something new, and what you know is often better than a stranger.

Here are my thoughts, they make me sound old, old and tame and dull at a time when everybody else is frisky and racy and flashing all that's new and improved in their lives. New spouses, new careers, new thighs, new lips. The world is dizzy with trade-ins. I could keep track, but I don't think I want to.

I grew up in the fifties with practical parents - a mother, God bless her, who washed aluminum foil after she cooked in it, then reused it-and still does. A father who was happier getting old shoes fixed than buying new ones.

They weren't poor, my parents, they were just satisfied. Their marriage was good, their dreams focused. Their best friends lived barely a wave away. I can see them now, fifties couples in Bermuda shorts and Banlon sweaters, lawnmower in one hand, tools in the other.

The tools were for fixing things - a curtain rod, the kitchen radio, screen door, the oven door, the hem in a dress.

Things you keep. It was a way of life, and sometimes it made me crazy. All that re-fixing, reheating, renewing, I wanted just once to be wasteful. Waste meant affluence.

Throwing things away meant there'd always be more. But then my father died, and on that clear autumn night, in the chill of the hospital room, I was struck with the pain of learning that sometimes there isn't any 'more.' Sometimes what you care about most gets all used up and goes away, never to return.

So while you have it, it's best to love it and care for it and fix it when it's broken and heal it when it's sick. That's true for marriage and friends and old cars and children with bad report cards and dogs with bad hips and aging parents. You keep them because they're worth it, because you're worth it.

Sometimes the best gifts are the old ones that you have already received. Receive the old gifts again, by looking around and appreciating your life, the people and the things in it...for they are the true gifts of life.

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.