Monthly Archive

December 2016

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 59 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
9209

You Know It's The New Year Again When ...

It has been a quiet week in the parsonage, notwithstanding the lack of cooperation from Mr. Weatherman. As the thermometer dipped, I ducked inside and sought the warmth of my easy chair. Since coming... read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
1537

Quote #1601

"The heaven of heavens cannot contain Him, and yet He condescends to find a house within our hearts!" - C. H. Spurgeon read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1330

One-liner #1153

"I have CDO; it's like OCD but all the letters are in alphabetical order ... as they should be." read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1565

Winter Twilight

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
9482

Attainable New Year's Resolutions

This year, I resolve to... - Gain weight; at least 30 pounds. - Stop exercising; waste of time. - Read less; makes you think. - Watch more TV; I've been missing some good stuff. - Procrastinate m... read more..

God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
2529

Another Christmas up the Chimney

It hardly seems possible that another Christmas has come and gone. I think it comes quicker than it goes, but then that is just my opinion. We were sitting for the last time around the Christmas tree... read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
941

Cybersalt News - December 29, 2016

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! With a new year ahead, Rev. James Snyder is looking forward with a keen appreciation of the memories - and a promise - from the past. You can read "Another Christmas up the... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1667

Roman Numeral Amnesia

I can't remember what 51, 6 and 500 are in Roman numerals. I'm LIVID.... read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
2362

Quote #1600

"I do not understand the mystery of grace; only that it meets us where we are and doesn't leave us where it found us." - Anne Lamott read more..

Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
3082

Jury Bribe

Murphy, a dishonest lawyer, bribed a man on his client's jury to hold out for a charge of manslaughter, as opposed to the charge of murder which was brought by the state. The jury was out for several... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
2791

The Day After Christmas

'Twas the day after Christmas and all through the room Strewn wrappings were crying for use of a broom. The children were scattered the friends' gifts exploring Since now most of theirs read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1493

One-liner #1152

They should make an alarm clock that sounds like a cat getting ready to vomit; NOTHING makes you jump out of bed faster!... read more..

Christmas Jokes
Pastor Tim
4357

You Know You Overdid Christmas Dinner When

You Know You Overdid Christmas Dinner When . . . - Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life to pry you out of the EZ-Boy. - The "Gravy Boat" your wife set out was a real 12' boat! - You receive a Sumo ... read more..

Christmas
Pastor Tim
1230

Be A Christmas Martyr

When we understand what the word "martyr" really means, we'll understand we are called to be one at Christmastime and throughout the year. (with apologies for the sound quality of this recording!) read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
1031

Cybersalt News - December 25, 2016

Sunday greetings and Merry Christmas everyone! Susan and I pray that the peace and light of Jesus rests upon and shine within your heart today. Mrs. Cybersalt finished our Christmas letter a few day... read more..

Christmas Jokes
Pastor Tim
5687

Christmas Explained

The other night, three-year-old Billy was showing the Terracotta nativity scene in his living room to his stuffed dragon. "This is an activity scene," he said to the dragon. "It's when they put brea... read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
4426

Quote #1599

"For unto us a child is born, unto us a Son is given; and the government will be upon His shoulder. And His name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
6067

More Christmas Puns

Some of you on this list will actually enjoy these - proof once again of the need for more therapists in the world, lol. What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?It's Christmas, Eve! What does ... read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1541

One-liner #1151

Mary glared at me Pa rumpa pum pum, Me and my drum.... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
1606

The Gift of the Magi

God is not served by human hands as though he needed anything (Acts 17:25). The gifts of the magi are not given by way of assistance or need-meeting. It would dishonor a monarch if foreign visitors ca... read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
1004

Cybersalt News - December 22, 2016

Oh look, Chicken Thursday - the last one before Christmas! Yesterday was the shortest day of the year for us Northern Hemispherical types.  It's a fitting reminder that Christmas can be a very d... read more..

Funny Christmas Pictures
Pastor Tim
2796

Christmas Sniper

That's when Eleanor spotted the sniper. ... read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
1522

Quote #1598

"Watch, O Lord, with those who wake, or watch, or weep tonight." - St. Augustine read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
61225

Christmas Puns

Some of these are horrible. Enjoy! What do they call Santa's helpers?Subordinate Clauses What do you call Santa Clause after he's fallen into a fireplace?Krisp Kringle Who sings "Love Me Tender" an... read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1548

One-liner #1150

Did you know, chocolate makes your clothes shrink!?... read more..

Christmas Jokes
Pastor Tim
4457

Practical Tricks to Play on Santa

1. Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds. 2. While he's in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a speeding tic read more..

God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
6140

‘Twas the night before Christmas...

Every family has those traditions and days that help define their family. I personally know some families (although I shall not divulge any names unless there is enough cash present) that are adequate... read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
955

Cybersalt News - December 18, 2016

Sunday greetings everyone. What do you buy for the woman who already has the greatest gift? Rev. James Snyder is not the only man to struggle with that question. You can read about his quest in "'Twa... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2474

Christmas Pizza

What is King Wenceslas' favorite pizza? One that's deep pan, crisp, and even.... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
2721

Who Started Christmas?

A woman was out Christmas shopping with her two children. After many hours of looking at row after row of toys and everything else imaginable, and after hours of hearing both her children asking for e... read more..

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