Entertainment

Once upon a time an evil king captured a beautiful princess and held her hostage in his high tower. Though she was very beautiful he forced her to wear a disgusting and smelly burlap dress.

"You'll never get away with this," she cried. "Some brave knight will rescue me!"

"Not in that old, dirty thing," the evil king replied.

She waited day and night, but it was just as the king predicted. Every knight that saw her in the window of the high tower was scared away by her disgustingly dirty dress. After many months the princess broke down crying and the evil king taunted her:

"You see? I told you no knight would rescue a damsel in this dress!"

My husband and I were returning home from our childbirth class at Manhattan's Beekman Hospital.

Noting my obvious pregnancy, the taxi driver, a Mr. Ho, proceeded to tell us about his wife's experience at the same hospital. She had been admitted one December 24 and the next day delivered triplets.

Visitors and staff were amused Christmas morning when they saw the newborns in the nursery and read the names on the three bassinets:

Ho, Ho, Ho.

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, and dry cleaners depressed?

Laundry workers could decrease, eventually becoming depressed and depleted! Even more, bedmakers will be debunked, baseball players will be debased, bulldozer operators will be degraded, organ donors will be delivered, software engineers will be detested, the BVD company will be debriefed, and even musical composers will eventually decompose.

On a more positive note, though, perhaps we can hope politicians will be devoted.

A psychiatrist is doing rounds in his hospital with a couple of students.

They look in on one patient and the psychiatrist says to his students, "Sometimes this fellow thinks he's a temptress in a Bizet opera, but today, as you can see from his goose stepping, he thinks he's the World War II head of the Nazi Luftwaffe. What condition do you think he's suffering from?"

The first student replies, "Is he a paranoid schizophrenic with a multiple personality disorder?"

The second student says, "No, I think he just doesn't know whether he's Carmen or Goering."