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The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings, everyone!

music goes to the dogsI was driving home from a men's gathering last evening (after enjoying a barbeque and making bows and arrows with my son-in-law, Josh) when I started to hear a rattle from the left front corner of my pickup truck. I was pretty sure I had a rock rattling around in the hub cover until the rattling sound changed into the sound of a metal part skipping down the road of the neighbourhood we had just turned into.

It turned out that the actual hub cover had come loose because, like me, it had a few loose screws. Well, actually, at the point it fell off it had no more screws, but it was still a fun memory to make with Josh, and for the guy sitting in his driveway who pointed me to the lawn the part had ended up on! It's a 92 Ford F150 4x4, so I suppose it's to be expected from time to time!

Today's video share is an example of what happens when music goes to the dogs.
Click here to watch.

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.

~ Pastor Tim 



Bulletin Humor

bible 3I hope the bulletin in your church is more accurate than these ones!

1.  Don't let worry kill you -- let the church help.

2.  Thursday night - Potluck supper.  Prayer and medication to follow.

3.  Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

4.  For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

5.  The rosebud on the alter this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.

6.  This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

7.  Tuesday at 4:00 PM there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk will please come early.

8.  Wednesday the ladies liturgy will meet. Mrs.  Johnson will sing "Put me in my little bed" accompanied by the pastor.

9.  Thursday at 5:00 PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All ladies wishing to be "Little Mothers" will meet with the Pastor in his study.

10.  This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

11.  The service will close with "Little Drops of Water." One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.

12.  Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will come forward and do so.

13.  The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They can be seen in the church basement Saturday.

14.  A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

15.  At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell." Come early and listen to our choir practice.

16.  The preacher will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth With Joy."

17.  Today...Christian Youth Fellowship House Sexuality Course, 8 p.m. Please park in the rear parking lot for this activity.

18.  During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when A. B. Doe supplied our pulpit.

19.  The Rev. Adams spoke briefly, much to the delight of his audience.

20.  The church is glad to have with us today as our guest minister the Rev. Stanley Green who has Mrs. Green with him.  After the service we request that all remain in the sanctuary for the Hanging of the Greens.

21.  The 'eighth graders' will be presenting Shakespeare's "Hamlet" in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m.  The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.



One-Liner #1753

forest 1To avoid straining your eyes when you're continuously working, follow the 20-20-20 rule; after 20 minutes of work, look at something 20 feet away, then spend 20 years in the forest.

@macabredarklingwaters



"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Be A Billionaire!


Braille Pun

brailleI took a friend of mine who is visually impaired to church with me this morning. Several of the children in the congregation were fascinated with her Braille Bible.

One of the adults came over to see what the kids were so excited about, and Ellen told the woman, "Oh, well, I was telling them how bumpy the road to salvation is."



Quote #2188

ocean storm"Divine deliverance does not always mean an escape from trouble: it sometimes means finding God in trouble."

John Stott



Weddings

boy capA little boy sat through a Sunday School class and learned about the time Jesus went to a wedding and changed the water into wine.

"And what did you learn from that story?" asked his father afterward.

The boy thought for a moment and then answered, "If you're having a wedding, make sure Jesus is there."


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

I’m So Poor I Can’t Pay Attention

PoorOccasionally I go to my computer and search for the wealthiest preachers in America. I am curious to know who came up with this idea, but I check it out occasionally to see who they are.

As often as I have checked this information, I have never found my name on that list. I so much wanted to see my name on that list. Everybody knows that the Internet never lies. So, I need to accept that I am not one of the wealthiest preachers in America. Poor me!

That may explain many things in my life that I did not quite understand before.

Read more

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.