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Today's CleanLaugh
 A friend of mine joined the Navy and soon after had to attend a wedding. He asked an officer for a pass and was told he had to be back by 7 p.m. Sunday.
"You don't understand, sir," my friend said. "I'm in the wedding."
"No, YOU don't understand," the officer replied. "You're in the Navy."
Today's One-liner
 I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes ...
Today's Clean Pun
 A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
The husband said, "Yes, but you are in charge of cooking around here so you should do it because that is your job. I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should make the coffee."
Husband replies, "I can't believe that. Show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says ...
"Hebrews"
Today's Quote
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”
- Theodore Roosevelt
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Today's Illustration
 I was the new coach of a Little League baseball team and had not yet learned the names of my players. At our first game I called each boy by the number on his uniform. When I yelled, "Number 5, your time to bat," Jeff Smith came to the plate. When I called for "Number 7," Steve Heinz jumped up. Then I yelled for "Number 1," but no one emerged from the dugout. Again I called for Number 1. Still no one came forward.
As the umpire looked on, annoyed at this delay of the game, I shouted; "Who's Number 1?"
That's when the whole team yelled, "We are, Coach! We are!"
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
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The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
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