|
 Today's CleanLaugh
10. Try to pep up the dance recital crowd by starting "the wave."
9. Do a halftime trampoline show.
8. With your buddies, spell out your child's name on your chests.
7. Mimic the conductor.
6. Start a paper airplane contest with the program.
5. Clip your toenails.
4. Wear a multi-colored wig and hold up a large, confusing sign.
3. In the middle of the violin piece, say loudly to the person next to you, "That reminds me...I need to take our cat to the vet."
2. Wear your wife's old cheerleading outfit.
1. Two words: cow bell.
 Today's One-liner
I just did a week's worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.


 Today's Clean Pun
A Spanish King was being attacked constantly by warlords. He called his advisors together and asked them to come up with a solution.
One said, "Remember the Greeks and the Trojan Horse?"
"Let's find out what the warlords like and we'll do the same trick."
"We know they won't eat pork, so a pig is not the answer. Chickens! They love chickens and eggs."
The Spanish King asked his carpenters to build a giant chicken, but they said it was too complicated, so they decided to build a giant wooden egg. They filled the egg with Basque mercenaries and rolled it in front of the warlord encampment.
"Oh mighty Chief, we have brought you a gift."
The warlords pulled the wooden egg inside their encampment. Soon there was great activity in the warlords camp -- they were feverishly building a giant pot. When they finished, they filled it with water and hauled the giant egg up into the water filled pot, and lit a fire under it. They were going to make a giant hard boiled egg breakfast for the troops! Soon smoke rose from the center of the camp.
The Basques realized they were cooking the egg!
The moral of the story: Don't put all your Basques in one egg!
 Today's Quote

Imagine if trees gave off WiFi signals, we would be planting so many trees and we'd probably save the planet too. Too bad they only produce the oxygen we breathe.
- Unknown

Cybersalt is a supporter of PEM. We invite you to join us in supporting persecuted Christians.


Today's Illustration
A woman went into a hardware store to purchase a bale of peat moss. She gave a personal check in payment and said to the clerk, "I suppose you will want some identification."
He replied, without hesitation, "No ma'am, that won't be necessary."
"How come?" asked the woman.
"Crooks don't usually buy peat moss," answered the clerk.
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Forward this e-mail to a friend
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
|