Cybersalt News
There are 5 Sundays remaining in my 6-month sabbatical. One of the things that I have gained from this time of rest is a new sense of fashion. You can see one of my new outfits at:
www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/sabbatical-fashion
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Wet Clothes
Cassie was a really good mom. When her children were growing up, her one son gave her more "stop and count to 10" periods than any of the others.
Once, after her small son fell into the pond and came home with his good school clothes dripping wet, the exasperated Cassie sent him to his room while she washed and dried his clothes.
A little later, Cassie heard a commotion in the back yard. She called out, "Are you out there wetting your pants again!?"
There was dead silence for a moment. Then a deep, masculine voice answered meekly, "No, ma'am, I'm just reading the meter."
Today's One-liner
One-liner #1081
A day without sunshine is like, night.
Today's Clean Pun
Canned Email Warning
WARNING!! There is an email going around offering processed pork, gelatin and salt in a can.
If you get this email DO NOT OPEN IT!
It is Spam!
Today's Quote
Quote #1529
"It’s not the load that breaks you down. It’s the way you carry it."
- Lou Holtz
Today's Illustration
Vengeance
In the traffic court of a large Midwestern city, a young woman was brought before the judge to answer for a ticket she received for driving through a red light.
She explained to the judge that she was a school teacher and requested an immediate dismissal of her case so she could get to the school on time.
A wild gleam came into the judge's eyes.
"You're a schoolteacher?" he said. "Madam, I shall realize my lifelong ambition. I've waited years to have a schoolteacher in this court.
Now sit down at that table and write 'I will not drive through red lights' 500 times!"
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.