Cybersalt News
There is a new Funny Picture on the Cybersalt Site today. It's a place where many people would have a hard time falling asleep. You'll find "Slingshot Bench" at:
www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/slingshot-bench
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Wait Watching
Having lost weight over the past few years, a lady was discarding things from her wardrobe that no longer fit.
Her seven-year-old niece was watching as she held up a huge pair of capris.
"Wow," the lady said, "I must have worn these when I was 183."
Her niece looked puzzled, then asked, "How old are you now?"
Today's One-liner
One-liner #1077
I don't own a cell phone or a pager; I just hang around everyone I know, all the time and if someone wants to get hold of me, they just say 'Mitch,' and I say 'what?' and turn my head slightly.
- Mitch Hedberg
Today's Clean Pun
Emperor Disappointment
It was a sad and disappointing day when I discovered my Universal Remote Control did not, in fact, control the Universe. (Not even remotely.)
Today's Quote
Quote #1525
"Worry is a misuse of imagination."
- Dan Zadra
Today's Illustration
The Many Names of CHRIST
To the ARTIST He is the One Altogether Lovely.
To the ARCHITECT He is the Chief Corner Stone.
To the BAKER He is the Living Bread.
To the BANKER He is the Hidden Treasure.
To the BIOLOGIST He is the Life.
To the BUILDER He is the Sure Foundation.
To the CARPENTER He is the Door.
To the DOCTOR He is the Great Physician.
To the EDUCATOR He is the Great Teacher.
To the ENGINEER He is the New and Living Way.
To the FLORIST He is the Rose of Sharon and the Lily of the Valley.
To the GEOLOGIST He is the Rock of Ages.
To the HORTICULTURIST He is the True Vine.
To the JUDGE He is the Righteous Judge, the Judge of All Men.
To the JEWELER He is the Pearl of Great Price.
To the LAWYER He is the Counselor, the Lawgiver, the Advocate.
To the NEWSPAPER He is the Good Tidings of Great Joy.
To the OCULIST He is the Light of the Eyes.
To the PHILANTHROPIST He is the Unspeakable Gift.
To the PHILOSOPHER He is the Wisdom of God.
To the PREACHER He is the Word of God.
To the SCULPTOR He is the Living Stone.
To the SERVANT He is the Good Master.
To the STATESMAN He is the Desire of All Nations.
To the STUDENT He is the Incarnate Truth.
To the THEOLOGIAN He is the Author and Finisher of our Faith.
To the TOILER He is the Giver of Rest.
To the SINNER He is the Lamb of God that takes away the sins of the World.
To the CHRISTIAN He is the Son of the Living God, the Savior, the Redeemer and the Lord.
To me...HE is all of this and more,
HE is my everything, my all in all.
HE is more than LIFE to me,
~MY SOON COMING KING~
What is He to you?
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.