Cybersalt News - February 13, 2016
If you do not like puns do not go to Cybersalt's Valentine Pun page at:
www.cybersalt.org/clean-puns/valentine-puns
If you do like to read flame e-mails I am sent because some people can't take a joke, head on over to the Hall of Flames where you can read the latest addition "Not Foxy Enough":
www.cybersalt.org/hall-of-flames/not-foxy-enough
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.
Today's CleanLaugh
Age
When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul.
When you are older, you will settle for being the master of your weight and the captain of your bowling team.
Today's One-liner
One-liner #0990
"I've gotten to the age where I need my false teeth and hearing aid before I can ask where I left my glasses."
Today's Clean Pun
Doughboy
The Pillsbury Doughboy is my my roll model.
Today's Quote
Quote #1439
“People do not drift toward holiness. Apart from grace-driven effort, people do not gravitate toward godliness, prayer, obedience to Scripture, faith, and delight in the Lord. We drift toward compromise and call it tolerance; we drift toward disobedience and call it freedom; we drift toward superstition and call it faith. We cherish the indiscipline of lost self-control and call it relaxation; we slouch toward prayerlessness and delude ourselves into thinking we have escaped legalism; we slide toward godlessness and convince ourselves we have been liberated.”
- D.A. Carson
Today's Illustration
Rest, Busyness
Helen and Amanda were discussing their busy schedules.
Helen said, "Amanda, I must ask you something. Every day I feel incredibly run down and tired. And yet, I see you looking as fresh as a rose. I have to know: what's your secret?"
"My secret? Every morning, without fail, I wake up at six o'clock sharp."
"You wake up at six o'clock?"
"Yes, and then I look at the clock, see what time it is, and go back to sleep for another four hours."
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.