Inspiration

A four-year-old was at the pediatrician for a check up. As the doctor looked in her ears, he asked, "Do you think I'll find Big Bird in here?"

The little girl stayed silent.

Next, the doctor took a tongue depressor and looked down her throat. He asked, "Do you think I'll find the Cookie Monster down there?"

Again, the little girl was silent.

Then the doctor put a stethoscope to her chest. As he listened to her heartbeat, he asked, "Do you think I'll hear Barney in there?"

"Oh, no!" the little girl replied. "Jesus is in my heart. Barney's on my underpants."

26. Take a day off alone; make a retreat. You can learn from monks and hermits without becoming one.

27. Pet a furry friend. You will give and get the gift of now.

28. Work with your hands. It frees the mind.

29. Take time to wonder. Without wonder, life is merely existence.

30. Sit in the dark. It will teach you to see and hear, taste and smell.

31. Once in a while, turn down the lights, the volume, the throttle, the invitations. Less really can be more.

32. Let go. Nothing is usually the hardest thing to do - but often it is the best.

33. Take a walk - but don't go anywhere. If you walk just to get somewhere, you sacrifice the walking.

34. Count your friends. If you have one, you are lucky. If you have more, you are blessed. Bless them in return.

35. Count your blessings - one at a time and slowly.

1) If it rings, put it on hold.

2) If it clanks, call the repairman.

3) If it whistles, ignore it.

4) If it's a friend, take a break.

5) If it's the boss, look busy.

6) If it talks, take notes.

7) If it's handwritten, type it.

8) If it's typed, copy it.

9) If it's copied, file it.

10) If it's Friday, forget it!

*Adolescence*

**Nowadays our youngsters are acting as if adolescence is the last fling at life instead of the introduction to it.

**Some philosopher said that adolescence is the best substitute ever invented for experience.

**Adolescence begins when children stop asking questions -- not because they don't want to learn, but because they know all the answers.

**I can't make up my mind, does adolescence ruin cars or do cars ruin the younger generation.

**I think parents dread adolescence because they remember what they used to do during this period.

**This is that wonderful time when girls stop making faces at boys and slip into making eyes.

**You can easily tell when a child enters adolescence -- they start asking questions that you CAN answer but wish you didn't have to.

**Children are first aware they are entering the period when they find their parents become more difficult.

**This is that confusing period where children are too young to give advice and too old to take any.

**This is a period of time-warping. Your kids age five years -- from 13 to 18 -- while you age 20 years.

**It is easy to recognize an adolescent boy -- it's the time when he goes from quoting his dad to criticizing the old man.

**Finally, what really gets me mad is that this is the time my boy begins objecting to my wanting my own way!