Issue #4481
Cybersalt News
Oh look, Chicken Thursday!
Today I'd like to share a new project I just launched for a client. It's the "DeHaan on Fire" YouTube channel where I'll be interviewing world famous fire investigator, Dr. John DeHaan. If you know of anyone in the firefighting world I'd appreciate you sharing it with them. And of course, if you have two minutes to watch and maybe give the video a like that would be great too!
www.youtube.com/channel/UC_tYj8gTWv64WI425yzMiWQ
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Forgetting Something
A man was on his way home with a new car, which was absorbing all his attention, when it struck him that he had forgotten something.
Twice he stopped, counted his parcels, searched his pockets, but finally decided he had everything with him. Yet the feeling persisted.
When he reached home his daughter ran out, stopped short, and cried:
"Daddy, where's Mommy?"
Today's One Liner
One-Liner #1407
Self-Annihilating Descriptions
No one goes there anymore; it's too crowded.
Today's Clean Pun
Code Consumption
After I drink coffee I like to show the empty mug to the IT guy to tell him that I've successfully installed Java.
He hates me.
Today's Quote
Quote #1848
"If being hurt by church causes you to lose faith in God, then your faith was in people not in God."
- Larry Bluford Jr.
Today's Illustration
Tips From Cowboys, Everyday Wisdom
~ Never squat with your spurs on!
~ Never kick a fresh cow chip on a hot day.
~ There's two theories to arguin' with a woman....
Neither one works.
~ Don't worry about bitin' off more than you can chew.
Your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger than you think.
~ If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.
~ After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
~ If you find yourself in a hole the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
~ Never smack a man who's chewin' tobacco.
~ It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
~ Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
~ Good judgement comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgement.
~ Always drink upstream from the herd.
~ Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.
~ If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
~ When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.
~ When you're throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.
~ Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back.
~ Always take a good look at what you're about to eat.
It's not so important to know what it is, but it's critical to know what it was.
~ The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.
~ Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.