Cybersalt News
Sunday greetings everyone!
It is one week until Father's Day! Why not get that special man in your life something cool like this portable power bank for quickly and fully charging his phone or tablet? Plus you'll be supporting the Cybersalt sites!
Speaking of Father's day, Rev. James Snyder has been pondering the effectiveness of spanking during his childhood. You can read "Where Have All the Fathers Gone?" at:
www.cybersalt.org/gods-penman/where-have-all-the-fathers-gone
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
No Contraband
After an overnight flight to meet my father at his latest military assignment, my mother wearily arrived at Rhein-Main Air Base in Germany with my eight siblings and me - all under age 11. Collecting our many suitcases, the ten of us entered the cramped customs area.
A young customs official watched our entourage in disbelief, "Ma'am," he said, "do all these children and this luggage belong to you?"
"Yes, sir," my mother said with a sigh. "They're all mine."
The customs agent began his interrogation: "Ma'am, do you have any weapons, contraband or illegal drugs in your possession?"
"Sir," she calmly answered, "if I'd had any of those items, I would have used them by now."
The official allowed us to pass without opening a single suitcase.
Today's One Liner
One-liner #1290
"Oh, the majesty of French Justice, which forbids rich and poor, alike, to sleep on park benches!"
- Anatole France
Not near a plug? No problem - Charge your devices quickly on the go!
Today's Clean Pun
Granite Conundrum
"Nothing is written in stone."
Seriously?
Today's Quote
Quote #1731
"Comfort and prosperity have never enriched the world as much as adversity has."
- Billy Graham
Today's Illustration
What Children Say About Heaven
Mom, God's so neat, and heaven's supposed to be so great. Could me and Michael go there Saturday for a sleep-over?
---
Our seven-year-old daughter, Clarisa, was not really excited about going to Sunday school, but her little friend talked her into it. After the first class, at lunch, she said, "I like my teacher, and she said if I come to Sunday school every Sunday, she'll show me how I can get a free trip to heaven."
---
My three-year-old granddaughter, Morgan, came over one day and looked around the room and asked, "Where's Grandpa?"
I answered, "He's in heaven."
Surprised, she looked at me and said, "Still?"
---
I know what heaven is like because I was there. God makes people when He thinks of them, and then they wait to be born.
---
Our six-year-old, Rachel, prayed, "God, they keep telling us You love us kids. But I'm wondering: if You know my older brother, do You think he'll ever get to heaven?"
---
Grandma's gone to heaven, and she'll be happy there because there's a Dairy Queen everywhere. Right?
---
When Jenny was four, she asked, "Does heaven have a floor?"
Surprised, I said, "Well, Jenny, what do you think heaven is like?"
She looked up at the sky and clouds and replied, "Well, I can't see any floor, so I guess people are just up there on coat hangers!"
---
I told nine-year-old Heather that someday we would have glorified bodies.
She asked, "Do you think we'll look like Barbie?"
---
One day my five-year-old grandson, Brett, who frequently went fishing with his dad, told his mother,
"If Grandma's going to heaven with us, God had better have a pretty big fishing rod to haul her in!"
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.