Cybersalt News
Do you have a neighbor who is always badgering you? So does Neil - as you can see in the newest Funny Animal Picture "Badgering Neighbor" on the Cybersalt site at:
www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/badgering-neighbor
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Lumberjack
A man comes up to the owner of a lumberjack business and says, "I need a job and I think I'm pretty good."
The owner replied, "Okay, show me what you can do, chop down that redwood over there." The man said okay and left. Five minutes later he came back and was done.
The owner was shocked and asked, "How did you chop that tree down so fast?"
The man said, "I got a lot of practice in the Sahara."
The owner replied, "You mean the Sahara desert?"
"Yes" he said, "or at least that's what they call it now."
Today's One-liner
One-liner #1088
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the ability to reach it.
Today's Clean Pun
Borrowing Thanks
Thank-you student loans for getting me through university.
I don't think I can ever repay you!
Today's Quote
Quote #1536
"Do not think that you can show your love for Christ by hating those who seem to be His enemies on earth. Suppose they really do hate Him: nevertheless He loves them, and you cannot be united with Him unless you love them too."
- Thomas Merton, New Seeds of Contemplation
Today's Illustration
The Bar vs. The Baptists
In a small Midwestern conservative town, a business owner began to construct a building for a new bar. The local Baptist church started a campaign to block the bar from opening with petitions and prayers.
Work progressed, however, right up until the week before opening, when a lightning strike hit the bar and it burned to the ground.
The church folks were rather smug in their outlook after that, until the bar owner sued the church on the grounds that the church was ultimately responsible for the demise of his building, either through direct or indirect actions or means.
In its reply to the court, the church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection to the building's demise.
As the case made its way into court, the judge looked over the paperwork at the hearing and commented, "I don't know how I'm going to decide this, but as it appears from the paperwork, we have a bar owner who believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that doesn't!"
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.