Cybersalt News
Cybersalt's Mother's Day Jokes collection page has been spruced up. You'll find a collection of jokes for tomorrow's special day at:
www.cybersalt.org/tag/13-mother-s-day-jokes
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing! ~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Geraniums
A man walked into a flower shop and after looking around for several minutes, asked the clerk if there were any potted geraniums he could buy.
"I'm sorry," said the clerk in flower shop,
"We don't have potted geraniums. Could you use African violets instead?"
Replied the customer sadly,
"No, it was geraniums my wife told me to water while she was gone."
Today's One-liner
One-liner #1047
I hate it when people use big words just to make themselves sound perspicacious.
Today's Clean Pun
Jedi Utensils
Luke Skywalker and Obi Wan Kenobe walk into a Chinese Restaurant.
Ten minutes into the meal, Luke is still having trouble with the chopsticks, dropping food everywhere.
Obi-Wan finally tells him, “Use the forks, Luke."
Today's Quote
Quote #1495
"Lord, enlighten what's dark in me, strengthen what's weak in me, mend what's broken in me, bind what's bruised in me, heal what's sick in me, and lastly, revive whatever peace and love has died in me."
- Anonymous
Today's Illustration
Raising Children and Bamboo
Did you know that there is a certain type of bamboo in Japan that only flowers once every 120 years?
It's certainly puzzling how this plant can keep track of time, but everything 119 years before it germinates will determine how much the bamboo will bloom. And that's a long time to wait to see the results.
In the same way, children don't always blossom on your timetable. The love, discipline and instruction you pour into their lives cannot be immediately seen. Your job as a parent is to prune and nourish your children in anticipation of their blooming. And once they do, you'll see them grow rapidly into patient, loving and consistent people.
The latest bloomers often have the most striking and beautiful flowers.
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.