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In Today's Issue
     ÂCybersalt News
There is a new Funny Cat Picture on the Cybersalt site today. You'll find "Cat Snowman" at:
www.cybersalt.org/funny-cat-pictures/cat-snowman
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
   ÂToday's CleanLaugh
Burns and Benny
Jack Benny and George Burns became friends when both were young performers working their way up through the vaudeville circuit, and they remained friends until Benny died. One day, they were lunching at a Hollywood restaurant, and Benny was wrestling with the problem of whether or not to butter his bread.
"I like butter on my bread," he said. "But my diet strictly forbids butter. Maybe I should call Mary and ask her what to do."
"Jack," Burns said, "don't be ridiculous. You're a grown man. You should be able to decide, without your wife's help, whether or not to butter your own bread."
"You're right," Benny said. "I'll just have the butter, that's all."
When the waiter arrived with the check, Burns pointed to Benny and said, "He's paying."
"What?" Benny said. "Why should I have to pay the whole bill?"
"Because if you don't," Burns said, "I'll tell Mary about the butter."
Today's One-liner
One-liner #0976
A yawn is just a silent scream for coffee.
Today's Clean Pun
Yogurt Aisle
The yogurt aisle is so confusing now: It's all Greek to me.
Today's Quote
Quote #1424
Don't let success go to your head: Don't let failure go to your heart.
Today's Illustration
Investing, Long Term Planning
Approaching eighty-five years of age, Mrs. Lipkowitz finally decided it was time to give up her apartment in New York and move to Miami. She was given the name of a Florida realtor, who enthusiastically drove her all over Miami, extolling the virtues of every apartment they looked at.
"And this one, what a steal," he rhapsodized, "the investment of a lifetime. Why, in ten years it's gonna be worth three times..."
"Sonny," interrupted Mrs. Lipkowitz, "at my age I don't even buy green bananas."
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
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