July 2018 - Monthly Archive

30 Jul

One-liners

Susan Davis

1318

One-liner #1305

Walkie-talkies neither walk nor talk; they should be called holdie-noisies.... read more..

29 Jul

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

725

Cybersalt News - July 29, 2018

Sunday greetings everyone! Thanks to all the new "billionaires" who donated to the "Be a Billionaire" fund raiser. You learn more and still donate to help persecuted Christians and receive worthless,... read more..

28 Jul

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

3266

Complaint Box

On my tombstone, please write: "Not appreciating my puns was a grave mistake."... read more..

28 Jul

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1866

Moms, Child rights, Parent Rights

My son came home from school one day,with a smirk upon his face.He'd decided he was smart enough,to put me in my place. "Guess what I learned in Civics Two,that's taught by Mr. Wright?It's all about ... read more..

28 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3281

Fly Catch

My wife had never been to a baseball game, so I took her to see the Los Angeles Dodgers one night. Our seats were right behind the third-base line. At the top of the first inning, the batter hit a fo... read more..

28 Jul

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

3707

Now I Know How Noah Must Have Felt

I enjoy rain when it dances on the flowers on a hot summer afternoon invigorating the day and making everything smell fresh and clean. That is what rain is supposed to do. I believe it is found in s... read more..

Be A Billionaire Fund Raiser - Thank You

26 Jul

Uncategorised

Pastor Tim

797

Be A Billionaire Fund Raiser - Thank You

Thank you for your "Be A Billionaire" donation! Your gift will help persecuted Christians and encourage them greatly. If you are interested in connecting personally with a persecuted Christian, plea... read more..

26 Jul

One-liners

Susan Davis

1508

One-liner #1304

Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?... read more..

26 Jul

Quotes

Susan Davis

1982

Quote #1745

"Religion says: God will love us if we change. The Gospel says: God's love changes us." - Unknown read more..

26 Jul

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

749

Cybersalt News - July 26, 2018

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! This weeks news is longer than I usually like it to be, but last Sunday I said that today I would reveal the secret of the 52.19 trillion tally and it requires a few more p... read more..

25 Jul

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

4428

Church Feud

Church Feud (My apologies to those whose church is like this) Church feuds are not uncommon, especially among cliques in the congregation. But when the pastor and choir director get into it, sta... read more..

25 Jul

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1378

All Choked Up

The inventor of throat lozenges has died. There'll be no coffin at his funeral.... read more..

25 Jul

Be A Bill

Pastor Tim

483

One Billion Dollar Bill

Donate US$19.99 and receive a 1 Billion Dollar Bill from the Reserve Bank of Zimbabwe. All proceeds go to help persecuted Christians in need. Click here to learn how it all works!... read more..

25 Jul

Be A Bill

Pastor Tim

515

Ten Billion Dollar Bill

Donate US$19.99 and receive a 10 Billion Dollar Bill from the Reserve Bank of Zimbabwe. All proceeds go to help persecuted Christians in need. Click here to learn how it all works!... read more..

25 Jul

Be A Bill

Pastor Tim

469

Twenty Billion Dollar Bill

Donate US$29.99 and receive a 20 Billion Dollar Bill from the Reserve Bank of Zimbabwe. All proceeds go to help persecuted Christians in need. Click here to learn how it all works!... read more..

25 Jul

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2067

Eye Glass Confessions

As the three ladies picked up a menu, each put on a pair of glasses. "I really only need mine for close reading," explained the first. Remarked the second, "I only use mine when the light is bad." ... read more..

25 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3186

Calls to Information Assistance

Just a few decades ago, before the days of Google and online information, people would call an operator to get a phone number they needed. Often these phone calls resulted in funny conversations ... read more..

23 Jul

One-liners

Susan Davis

1659

One-liner #1303

99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.... read more..

23 Jul

Quotes

Susan Davis

1808

Quote #1744

"Comparison is the thief of joy." - Theodore Roosevelt read more..

22 Jul

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

784

Cybersalt News - July 22, 2018

Sunday greetings everyone! The tally of secrets is in and it totals 52.190 trillion. I'll revel them all in this Wednesday's mailing! While preparing today's mailing I was listening to a video so in... read more..

21 Jul

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1414

OS1

Adam & Eve: the first people to not read the Apple terms and conditions.... read more..

21 Jul

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2105

Marriage Tension

A friend of mine was having a bit of marital-tension in his household and was trying to figure out just what to do about it. In the course of our conversation, I happened to mention to him that: "You... read more..

21 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3655

Two Teas

1st customer: I'll have tea. 2nd customer: Me, too. And be sure the cup is clean! (The waiter exits, and then returns after a while.) Waiter: Two teas. Which one asked for the clean cup? read more..

21 Jul

Videos

Pastor Tim

2662

Nick Vujicic at Telford State Prison

Listen to and watch Nick Vujicic - a man who should have no hope - share his hope with prisoners at Telford State Prison. ... read more..

21 Jul

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

1290

Apple Fritter: The Fruit of My Choice

Our country, so it seems, runs on choice. The more choices we have, the better we like it. Most people in America pride themselves on the ability to make their own choices. “Freedom of Choice,” is t... read more..

19 Jul

One-liners

Susan Davis

1379

One-liner #1302

I told my parents they're famous now. I asked my dad who should play him in the movie and his answer did not disappoint: "Clint Eastward."... read more..

19 Jul

Quotes

Susan Davis

2882

Quote #1743

"God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pain." - C. S. Lewis read more..

19 Jul

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

787

Cybersalt News - July 19, 2018

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! This week I have some interesting work I am doing for a client. It involves some videoing of world renown fire investigator, Dr. John DeHaan (click to enlarge the picture).... read more..

18 Jul

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

4048

Car Mail

If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one at:
https://www.cybersalt.org/pastor-tim-s-cleanlaugh-site/what-is-a-goober

A goober is speaking to her psychiatrist. "I'm on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me." "Don't you have a phone in your car?" "That was a littl... read more..

18 Jul

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1283

Bibliostrep

I swallowed a dictionary. It gave me thesaurus throat I've ever had.... read more..