What I enjoy the most about holidays is the “eating frenzy.” It gives me opportunity to get away with a lot behind The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage’s back, which is a great challenge. I’m not always successful, but I try and I have my family to thank for that.

In the last few years, I have had some health issues, beginning with a heart attack, which was not that bad because I survived without any issues. Other issues concerning my health have developed over the years, requiring me to be on health pills.

Nobody knows more about that than The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. She oversees my medical pills daily. When I wake up in the morning, my medications are ready for me to take. Maybe I’ve become a drug addict!

I can handle all of these pills as long as they keep me healthy. What I have a hard time handling is my diet. The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage has me on a very strict diet that eliminates sugar in every category. I’m not allowed to have sugar or any foods that contain it. I really didn’t know how many foods had sugar.

She is quite overseeing in this regard for me. I have no idea what pills I am taking, but I leave that in the very qualified hands of The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. She knows medicine better than the doctors I know. She goes with me on every doctor’s visit and communicates with the doctor regarding my medicines.

Although my diet is very strict in this regard, the holiday season enables me to compromise it just a little behind the back of you know who.. When we have a family gathering around the dinner table with that big Turkey in the middle, there are all kinds of sugar-saturated foods there, much to the chagrin of The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. Being a family holiday gathering there is little she can do about it. They all bring their favorite food and much of it has sugar in it.

Usually, we have around 12 family members at these dinners, including several infants full of energy, which is a distraction and makes my sneaky plan more possible and easier to pull off.

If I eat something with sugar in it, and The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage doesn’t see me eat it, I’m off free and that sugar is at my most gracious disposal. During the last 10 years following my heart attack, I have worked on this to perfect it. I’m not there yet but I’m working on it..

Throughout this family Thanksgiving celebration, I keep boasting about the turkey and how delicious it is, and I get others around the table to talk about it in order to divert attention from my plan. Now, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage is actively involved in the serving of this meal.

My plan is to sneak a sugar-laden cookie or two from the table when she is distracted. With doughnuts, cookies, and pies all around, I couldn’t be in a better place.

When I want to pick up a cookie, I will cause a little distraction and talk about how delicious that turkey was, and whoever made that turkey is a genius. Everybody will laugh and point to the person who baked that turkey, none other than The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. Everybody will be laughing while behind the laughing I sneak a few cookies and slide them onto my plate.

After all, how can I get caught eating something somebody in our family baked? It would be very rude for me not to eat something that someone in our family brought to the meal. That is, everything but broccoli.

Those Thanksgiving dinners are some of the most wonderful times of the year. Yes, I love and enjoy the turkey. But if I can use the turkey to create a shield to sneak several cookies, it is that much more delicious.

After the meal when everybody has gone, I usually go and sit down in my easy chair and relax a bit and reflect on our time around the Thanksgiving table.

It is then that The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage will come and say, “I know you didn’t eat any cookies during the meal so I thought I would bring you one in appreciation of your faithful abstinence.”

Nothing feels more wonderful than when a plan comes together. I’m not sure who is tricking whom here. Did I trick her, or is she tricking me into believing that she didn’t see me take some cookies off the table?

I look at her and say very cheerfully, “You know those pies on the table today looked so delicious and I was so tempted when looking at them.”

“Well,” she said, “maybe I will let you have a small piece of pumpkin pie tonight for supper.”

Refusing her offer would be stupid; I munched her cookie, dreaming of the pumpkin pie I'd enjoy later - life's perfect moment.

As I was thinking of our family celebration I was reminded of a Bible verse, Psalm 127:3, “Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.”

Thinking about my family at our Thanksgiving celebration caused me to remember how blessed I am. My goal is not to take this blessing for granted but thank God each day for it.

Dr. James L. Snyder, is pastor of the Family of God Fellowship, 1471 Pine Road, Ocala, FL 34472. He lives with his wife in Silver Springs Shores. James is an award winning author whose books are available at https://amzn.to/2SMOjwO.

Call him at 352-687-4240 or e-mail [email protected]. The church web site is www.whatafellowship.com.