When it comes to sweet items, I am a connoisseur with a delicate palate. All I need is something sweet set before me, and I can tell you how wonderful it is after the first bite. I may be a little addicted to sweet things.
After celebrating 55 years of marital bliss, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage makes some of the sweetest desserts I have ever tasted. Whether it's a pie, a cookie, or a cake, they are all the sweetest I have ever tasted. Over the past few years, she has limited my intake of sweets for my health's sake, and I acknowledge her dedication.
After these years of marriage, I have noticed that The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage comes up with names that confuse me. I try not to let it bother me, and I don't ask her to explain herself because I know what that would lead to. I take note of the words she uses, especially when she describes other people.
I'm not very good with these kinds of words; once in a while I will say to her, "You're as sweet as an Apple Fritter." Of course, she is not very appreciative of that name, which is why I use it as often as I possibly can. I don't know anything sweeter than an Apple Fritter.
Just recently, I heard her use a new name I'd never heard before. We were watching TV together, and I believe it was Judge Judy. If you ever watched that show, you know there are a lot of crazy people who come before that judge.
We were watching this program, and there was one guy who was really loopy in many regards. When Judge Judy announced her verdict, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage said, "That guy was a real fruitcake."
I had never heard that word in that context. Yes, I've heard it referring to food, but never about a person.
Staring at her for a few moments, I said, "What do you mean he's a fruitcake?"
"Didn't you hear that guy? He was the most eccentric idiot I've ever seen. To me he is the face of a fruitcake."
That sorta hit me by surprise. I've never heard that definition before, or that word used to describe somebody. But if The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage used it, it must be so.
That put me on guard because I was watching to see whether she would call me a fruitcake. If so, I knew it would not be in a very positive or nice way. Of course, I may be a fruitcake in that sense of the word, but I hope she doesn't use it to define me.
Thinking about that for several days, it came to my mind that the world is filled with fruitcakes. Everywhere I looked recently, I've been seeing fruitcakes all around me.
This is the election year in our country, so there are a lot of politicians on TV, and I hate to admit it, but many of them are fruitcakes in this sense of the word. It has nothing to do with their political affiliation and everything to do with being crazy.
I can think of a lot of relatives that would qualify for this definition. Thinking about it, I come from a family of fruitcakes. If that is so, it would explain a lot of things that happen in our family. I'm waiting for my children and grandchildren to realize that they have "Fruitcake" in their DNA.
I will not press the subject, but maybe The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage looked at me as a fruitcake. I look at her as an Apple Fritter, which is a whole lot different than a fruitcake.
There are a lot of people in this world that are eccentric in every sense of that word. Examining them, you can see that they are slightly strange in a lot of things that they do and say. I never thought of it this way before, but being a little strange is not that bad.
I may be a little strange to certain people, if that's what eccentric means, but I'm OK with it. I hope I never find out who those people are who think I'm a fruitcake. Most importantly, I hope I never hear The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage call me a fruitcake. I'm sure it's true, or she would not say it.
We were driving across town to do some shopping together, and as we were going, I happened to mention it. "Do you sometimes think that I'm a fruitcake?"
Without missing a beat, she said, "Look at the license plate on that car over there. They're from California. I wonder what they're doing here."
I knew exactly what she was doing, and it really got me out of trouble I might have gotten into. Sometimes it is best not to ask questions, particularly if I'm around The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage.
A verse from the Bible came to mind as I thought about this.
Ephesians 4:32, "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you."
The troubling aspect of the verse is treating others as God has treated me. Reflecting on this I thought if God can do this to me, then I could do this to everyone around me.
Dr. James L. Snyder, is pastor of the Family of God Fellowship, 1471 Pine Road, Ocala, FL 34472. He lives with his wife in Silver Springs Shores. James is an award winning author whose books are available at https://amzn.to/2SMOjwO.
Call him at 352-687-4240 or e-mail jamessnyder2@att.net. The church web site is www.whatafellowship.com.