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Cybersalt News
Oh look, Chicken Thursday!
My shop cleanup project is coming along. My progress was slowed for 3 days due to a sprained ankle (not due to tripping on clutter), but I now have a clear path to the back corner. Now all I have to do is tidy/toss/clean my my back to the door!
Today's video share reminds us that sometimes making a mess can be a beautiful thing!
Click here to watch.
~ Pastor Tim
Actual Warnings On Products
On instructions for a hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
On a bar of Dial bath bar:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
On a frozen dinner package:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
On a hotel-provided shower cap box:
Fits one head.
On Tesco's Tirimisu dessert:
Do not turn upside down (Printed on the bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
On packaging from a Rowenta Iron.
Do not iron clothes on body.
On Boot's children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
On a bottle of Nytol (a sleeping aid):
Warning: May cause drowsiness.
On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: Keep out of children.
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
On a Japanese food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts.
On an American Airlines package of nuts:
Instructions: Open package, eat nuts.
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
On a package of Sunmaid raisins:
Why not try tossing over your favorite breakfast cereal?
One-Liner #1666
I ate a clock yesterday; it was very time consuming.
"Be a Billionaire!"
and Help
Refugees and
Persecuted Christians
Scroll Worker
Did you hear about the guy from Utah who wanted to become a writer?
Well, he tried for many years but never produced anything he was satisfied with and, certainly, never sold anything. So, he took up carpentry.
This was a great career move because he had a great aptitude for wood butchery. In fact, he became a highly sought after cabinet maker.
He billed himself as the Mormon Nailer.
Quote #2103
"I'm not busy ... a woman with three children under the age of 10 wouldn't think my schedule looked so busy."
- Garrison Keillor
Prejudice, Anti-Semitism
The wonderful comic, Sam Levenson, had a great answer to anti-Semites.
"It's a free world and you don't have to like Jews, but if you DON'T, I suggest that you boycott certain Jewish products, like .....
The Wasserman Test for syphilis, Digitalis, discovered by Doctor Nuslin,
Insulin, discovered by Doctor Minofsky,
Chloral Hydrate, discovered by Doctor Lifreich,
The Schick Test for Diphtheria,
Vitamins, discovered by Doctor Funk,
Streptomycin, discovered by Doctor Woronan,
The Polio Pill by Doctor Sabin,
and the Polio Vaccine by Doctor Jonas Salk.
Go on, boycott!
Humanitarian consistency requires that my people offer all these gifts to all people of the world.
Fanatic consistency requires that all bigots accept Syphilis, Diabetes, Convulsions, Malnutrition, Polio and Tuberculosis as a matter of principal.
You want to be mad at us? Be mad at us! But I'm telling you, you ain't going to feel so good."
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.