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Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

Last week's PearlyGates joke (www.cybersalt.org/pearly-gates-jokes/stamp-quality) was about Stalin complaining about the quality of a stamp bearing his image. Thanks to subscribers Pastor Mary S., Lance C., and David T., for noticing and letting me know I had included an image of a stamp with Lenin by mistake.

First of all, I'm impressed that each of you three has such a keen eye for Russian leaders!

Next, to those who did not notice, rest assured I have reported Mary, Lance, and David to Homeland security.

Finally, I must say I am surprised I made that mistake because Lenin is my favourite Beatle!

Today's video share is a cool time lapse of 2004-2008 dome growth of Mount St Helens. Remember, just because something looks like it isn't moving, doesn't mean it isn't moving!

Click here to watch the video.

~ Pastor Tim

Here are some of the "All-Time Dumbest Questions" asked by Banff Park tourists.

On nature...

• How do the elk know they're supposed to cross at the "Elk Crossing" signs?
• At what elevation does an elk become a moose?
•  Tourist: "How do you pronounce 'Elk'?" Park Information Staff: " 'Elk.'"  Tourist: "Oh."
•  Are the bears with collars tame?
•  Is there anywhere I can see the bears pose?
•  Is it okay to keep an open bag of bacon on the picnic table, or should I store it in my tent?
•  Where can I find Alpine Flamingos?
•  I saw an animal on the way to Banff today ... Could you tell me what it was?
•  Are there birds in Canada?

On geography...

• Did I miss the turnoff for Canada? (while standing in the middle of Banff!)
• Where does Alberta end and Canada begin?
• Do you have a map of the State of Jasper?
• Is this the part of Canada that speaks French, or is that Saskatchewan?
• If I go to B.C., do I have to go through Ontario?
• Which is the way to the Columbia Ricefields?
• How far is Banff from Canada?
• What's the best way to see Canada in a day?

On tourist facilities...

• Do they search you at the B.C. border?
• When we enter B.C. do we have to convert our money to British pounds?
• Where can I buy a raccoon hat? ALL Canadians own one, don't they?
• Are there phones in Banff?
• So it's eight kilometers away... is that in miles? We're on the decibel system you know.
• Where can I get my husband really, REALLY, lost??
• Is that 2 kilometers by foot or by car?
• Don't you Canadians know anything?

I just got kicked out of the flat earth Facebook group because I asked if the 6 foot social distancing rule had pushed anyone over the edge yet.

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Persecuted Christians

“Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN down under.”

"I am struck by how sharing our weakness and difficulties is more nourishing to others than sharing our qualities and successes."

- Jean Vanier

While I was employed by a private corporation and assigned to the space-shuttle program, my job included ordering supplies.

One of the engineers asked me to get a new dictionary for him. The request form said, "State reason this item is needed," so I asked him why he wanted one.

I expected his answer would be "My old copy is lost" or "The cover is falling off." Instead he replied, "My edition defines spaceship as an 'imaginary aircraft.'"

He got his new dictionary.

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.