Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

I don't have a new chicken picture today, but I do have a chicken story thanks to subscriber Dawn M. who shared it with us!
wreg.com/news/police-looking-for-aggressive-chicken-terrorizing-bank-customers-in-louisiana

Wash your hands, keep safe and enjoy the rest of today's mailing!

~ Pastor Tim

Today's CleanLaugh

Three Rules

One of my husband's duties as a novice drill instructor at Fort Jackson, South Carolina, was to escort new recruits to the mess hall. After everyone had made it through the chow line, he sat them down and told them,

"There are three rules in this mess hall: Shut up! Eat up! Get up!"

Checking to see that he had everyone's attention, he asked, "What is the first rule?"

Much to the amusement of the other instructors, 60 privates yelled in unison,

"Shut up, Drill Sergeant!"

Today's One Liner

One-liner #1476

If everything goes perfectly, something's wrong.

Today's Clean Pun

Pork Alias

A farmer called his pig Ball Point.

Well, it wasn't its real name, just a pen name.

Today's Quote

Quote #1914

"Conspiracy theories are a convenient alternative to an uncertain world."

- Unknown

Today's Illustration

Rebellion

When I worked for the security department of a large retail store, my duties included responding to fire and burglar alarms. A side door of the building was wired with a security alarm, because it was not supposed to be used by customers.

Nevertheless they found the convenience of the exit tempting. Even a sign with large red letters, warning "Alarm will sound if opened," failed to deter people from using it. One day, after attending to a number of shrieking alarms, I placed a small handmade sign on the door that totally eliminated the problem:

"Wet paint."

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.