Issue #4525
Cybersalt News
Sunday Greetings everyone!
Rev. James Snyder has been having having more fun with telemarketers and his cell phone. You can read "Did I Just Call Myself?" at:
www.cybersalt.org/gods-penman/did-i-just-call-myself
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
10 Ways You Know Your Internet Connection Is A Little Slow
1. Text on Web pages displays as Morse Code.
2. Graphics arrive via FedEx.
3. You believe a heavier string might improve your connection.
4. You post a message to your favorite newsgroup and it displays a week later.
5. Your credit card expires while ordering online.
6. ESPN Web site exhibits "Heisman Trophy Winner" ... for 1989.
7. You're still in the middle of downloading that popular new game, "Pac Man."
8. Everyone you talk to on the 'net phone' sounds like Forrest Gump.
9. You receive e-mails with stamps on them.
10. When you click the "Send" button, a little door opens on the side of your monitor and a pigeon flies out.
Today's One Liner
One-liner #1452
Suburbia: Where they tear out the trees and then name streets after them.
Today's Clean Pun
Label Truth
That "best by" date stamp is really just a spoiler alert.
Today's Quote
Quote #1890
"Raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder."
- Rumi
Today's Illustration
Security
A friend who lives in NYC has six locks on his door; all in a row. When he goes out, he only locks every other one.
That way, no matter how long somebody tries to pick the locks, they are always locking three.
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.