Cybersalt News
Sunday greetings everyone.
Summer is here and so is the heat for many of you in the northern hemisphere. As a bonus link, here is some heat wave humor that will hopefully keep you cool in spirit at least!
www.cybersalt.org/clean-jokes/heat-wave-humor
Rev. James Snyder is a hard worker, so he can't be blamed for being lazy from time to time. Still, though, his wife is keeping an eye on him! You can read "After All, It Is Monday" at:
www.cybersalt.org/gods-penman/after-all-it-is-monday
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Self-Evident Truths about Pets
* Although cats are rather delicate creatures, and they are subject to a good many ailments, I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia.
* Dogs and cats instinctively know the exact moment their owners will wake up. Then they wake them 10 minutes sooner.
* Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.
* Dogs shed, cats shred.
* I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult?
* No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does.
* Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
* I hope to be the kind of person my dog thinks I am.
* Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.
* We wonder why the dogs always drink out of our toilets, but look at it from their point of view: Why do humans keep peeing into their water bowls?
* Women and cats will do as they please ... men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.
* When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.
Today's One Liner
One-liner #1396
Every once in a while, it never stops raining.
Today's Clean Pun
Grammar Judgment
People who do not use punctuation deserve a long sentence.
Today's Quote
Quote #1837
"Doctrine is not just a bundle of the church's own ideas, thoughts, and dreams about God, but is a declaring of what God Himself has shown and told us."
- J. I. Packer
Today's Illustration
Honest Money
Sam and George go to the bank to cash their paychecks.
After Sam cashes his check George hands the young teller his check. He moves away from the teller, counts his change, and then goes back and says to the cashier, "Hey, you gave me the wrong change!"
The cashier says: "Sir, you stepped away from the counter. There's nothing I can do about it now."
George says nothing and joins Sam who says, "She's got some nerve. You should complain to the manager!"
"Oh no," George says. "In fact, I was going to tell her that I just thought she'd like to know she gave me ten dollars too much."
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.