Cybersalt News
Sunday greetings!
I can neither confirm nor deny that I play Pokemon Go, but if I did I imagine that I might have more gifts to send than I have friends to send them too in that game. Also, and this is just hypothetical of course, if I did play that game my trainer code might be 6991 8331 3052. You know, if anyone wanted to add me as a friend - just say'n.
Rev. James Snyder's ears perked up when he heard talk of plastic surgery in his house, but it turned out not to be the kind of snipping he thought is was going to be. You can read, "Financial Tip Of The Week: Pay Attention" at:
https://www.cybersalt.org/gods-penman/financial-tip-of-the-week-pay-attention
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Women Drivers
(Don't judge a joke by its title.)
Driving to town this morning on the Interstate, I looked over to my left and there was a woman in a brand new Mustang doing 65 miles per hour with her face up next to her rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner!
I looked away for a couple seconds and when I looked back she was halfway over in my lane, still working on that dumb makeup!!!
It scared me so bad I dropped my electric shaver, which knocked the donut out of my other hand.
In all the confusion of trying to straighten out the car using my knees against the steering wheel, it knocked my cell phone off my knee and it fell into the coffee between my legs and DISCONNECTED AN IMPORTANT CALL!
WOMEN DRIVERS!
Today's One Liner
One-liner #1320
She ran the gamut of emotions - from A to B.
Today's Clean Pun
Starch Mobile
My sister didn't believe that I could build a car out of spaghetti.
You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta.
Today's Quote
Quote #1761
"Parenting was much easier when I was raising my non-existent kids hypothetically."
- Unknown
Today's Illustration
Foolish Rage
On the Upper West Side lived a man who was a very militant atheist but he sent his son to Trinity School because, despite its Christian roots, it was a great school. After a month, the boy comes home and says casually, "By the way Dad, do you know what Trinity means? It means the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost."
The father can barely control his rage. He seizes his son by the shoulders and declares,
"Danny, I'm going to tell you something now and I want you never to forget it. There is only one God and we don't believe in Him!"
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.