Cybersalt News
Oh look, Chicken Thursday!
Today's new funny sign picture on the Cybersalt Site shows the logical outcome of screaming for ice cream. You will find "I Scream for Ice Cream" at:
www.cybersalt.org/funny-signs/i-scream-for-ice-cream
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Interview Phrases
Phrases for you to use in a job interview - or to interpret when interviewing!
Phrase: I'm extremely adept at all manners of office organization.
Meaning: I've used Microsoft Office.
Phrase: I'm honest, hard-working and dependable.
Meaning: I pilfer office supplies.
Phrase: I take pride in my work.
Meaning: I blame others for any mistakes.
Phrase: I'm personable.
Meaning: I give lots of unsolicited personal advice to co-workers.
Phrase: I am very adaptable.
Meaning: I've changed jobs a lot.
Phrase: I am on the go.
Meaning: I'm never at my desk.
Phrase: I'm highly motivated to succeed.
Meaning: The minute I find a better job, I'm outta here.
Today's One-liner
One-liner #1142
My boss said, "Dress for the job you want, not the job you have;"
now I'm sitting in a disciplinary meeting dressed as Batman.
Today's Clean Pun
Travelling Suit
A man who sued an airline because his luggage went missing ... has lost his case.
Today's Quote
Quote #1590
"A small leak will sink a great ship. A small spark will kindle a great fire. A little allowed sin will ruin an immortal soul."
- J.C. Ryle
Today's Illustration
Eternity
I spent 20 minutes explaining life insurance options to one of our employees.
After reviewing the different plans and monthly deductions, he decided to max out, choosing $100,000 worth of life insurance. But he had one last question.
"Now," he said, "what do I have to do to collect the money?"
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.