Cybersalt News
When can you tell you are in over your head with your baby? This picture might be a clue.
http://www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/paging-dr-phil
There is a new James Snyder devotional on the Cybersalt site today. Apparently the last couple of Mondays have given him some unwanted knocks.
http://www.cybersalt.org/god-s-penman/when-trouble-comes-a-knocking-dont-answer-the-door
Enjoy the rest of today's digest.
Here is today's CleanLaugh - "Cold Cream Questions"
A little boy watched, fascinated, as his mother gently rubbed cold cream on her face.
"Why are you rubbing cold cream on your face, mommy?" he asked.
"To make myself beautiful," said his mother.
A few minutes later, she began removing the cream with a tissue.
"What's the matter?" he asked. "Are you giving up?"
Today's CleanPun - "Today's Market Activity"
Helium was up.
Feathers were down.
Paper was stationary.
Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.
Knives were up sharply.
Cows steered into a bull market.
Pencils lost a few points.
Hiking equipment was trailing.
Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline.
Weights were up in heavy trading.
Light switches were off.
Mining equipment hit rock bottom.
Diapers remain unchanged.
Shipping lines stayed at an even keel.
The market for raisins dried up.
Dr Pepper fizzled.
Caterpillar stock inched up a bit.
Sun peaked at midday.
Balloon prices were inflated.
Scott Tissue touched a new bottom.
Today's One Liner
"What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money." ~Henny Youngman
Today's CleanQuote
"The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending and having the two as close together as possible."
~ George Burns
Today's Illustration - "Careless Words"
Featured Illustration items are well suited for introducing or illuminating a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
While my son was on board the Navy carrier USS GEORGE WASHINGTON, the air wing was busy with training missions.
After talking to a pilot, one air-traffic controller accidentally left his microphone on and remarked to a nearby buddy, "That guy sounded just like Elmer Fudd."
The airwaves got strangely quiet as everyone listened, realizing that the pilot had also heard the comment. After about ten seconds, the pilot broke the silence by announcing,
"Be vewy, vewy quiet. We are hunting submawenes."
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
Pastor Tim pastored at Westside Bible Church, Victoria, British Columbia from November 1996 to October 2017.