Cybersalt News

I'm not saying that men don't do housework, but if they did it would look like this.
http://www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/if-men-did-housework

Enjoy the rest of today's digest.

Here is today's CleanLaugh - "The Law of Parenthood"

There is the Law of Gravity - and then, there is the Law of Parenthood

- A child's behavior will improve in proportion to the distance she is away from the parent.

- Two is equal to two, except when referring to time. Two minutes of tantrum lasts 20 times as long as two minutes of quiet time.

- The choice of a preschooler's best friend corresponds directly to the distance the friend lives from your house.

- A child's enjoyment of a popular entertainment will be inversely proportionate to the parent's enjoyment.

- The chance of a surprise visit by your parents-in-law is directly proportional to the size of the mess in your home.

- A child will always eat exactly what she has loved for the past year unless it is the only food in the fridge.

- The ease with which a toddler acquires the ability to say a word increases with its likelihood to embarrass a sailor.

Today's CleanPun

Baseball umpires want salary hikes.
The response from the owners is, "Yikes!
Can't afford increased pay."
So the union does say,
"Then our recourse is calling more strikes."
~ Kirk Miller

Today's One Liner

"I've spent most of my life golfing - the rest I've just wasted"

Today's CleanQuote

"No matter how bad it gets, I'm rich at the dollar store."

Today's Illustration - "Patient Confession"

Featured Illustration items are well suited for introducing or illuminating a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Farmer Josh killed a pig and hung it up for the night, intending to butcher it in the morning, but the next day it was gone. He didn't tell a soul about it, and nothing happened for more than two months.

Then another farmer, who lived down the road, came by and said, "By the way Josh, did you ever find out who stole your pig?"

"Nope," said Josh. "Not until just now."

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.

Pastor Tim pastored at Westside Bible Church, Victoria, British Columbia from November 1996 to October 2017.