- "Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy."
- "Somebody call the janitor — we're going to need a mop."
- "Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness."
- "Sparky! Come back with that! Bad Dog!"
- "Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?"
- "Hand me that... uh... that uh... thingie."
- "Oh no! I just lost my Rolex."
- "Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived a full hypo of this stuff before?"
- "Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!"
- "Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing my concentration off."
- "What's this doing here?"
- "I hate it when they're missing stuff in here."
- "That's cool! Now can you make his leg twitch?!"
- "I wish I hadn't forgotten my glasses."
- "Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us."
- "Sterile, schmerile. The floor's clean, right?"
- "Anyone see where I left that scalpel?"
- "Next, we remove the subject's brain and place it in the body of the ape."
- "Now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature."
- "This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?"
- "Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?"
- "Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough."
- "What do you mean, 'You want a divorce'!"
- "She's gonna blow! Everyone take cover!!!"
- "FIRE! FIRE! Everybody get out!"
- "And next week, we'll be learning how to stitch up a patient..."