March 2018 - Monthly Archive

31 Mar

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

1339

The Easter Bunny That Got Away

After any holiday the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and myself enjoy taking a day or two off and just relax. We like to sit around and tell stories. My wife usually starts by saying, “Hey, remem... read more..

30 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4049

But Daddy

My husband and I took our two-year-old daughter to the home-improvement store. Madison got tired of walking, so my husband let her ride on his shoulders. As he walked, Madison began pulling his hair.... read more..

30 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2240

Our Greatest Need

“If God had perceived that our greatest need was economic, he would have sent an economist. If he had perceived that our greatest need was entertainment, he would have sent us a comedian or an artist... read more..

29 Mar

One-liners

Susan Davis

1269

One-liner #1279

Idols depend on you; God doesn't. ... read more..

29 Mar

Quotes

Susan Davis

2186

Quote #1721

"The reality of the bodily ascension of Jesus to Heaven makes an enormous difference. When understood, this truth becomes an irreplaceable, important resource for living our lives in the world - and read more..

29 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

996

Cybersalt News - March 29, 2018

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! Keep your eye out on the roads; police are always testing new kinds of speed traps. You'll see Officer Jenkin's unconventional one one at:www.cybersalt.org/funny-car-pictur... read more..

28 Mar

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1314

Mist Understanding

Vaporizers: Some people haven't the foggiest idea how to use them.... read more..

28 Mar

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

3089

Confession Tips

The new priest is nervous about hearing confessions, so he asks the older priest to sit in on his sessions. The new priest hears a couple of confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of th... read more..

28 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2204

A Likely Story

One of my students could not take my college seminar final exam because of a funeral. "No problem," I told him. "Make it up the following week." That week came, and again he couldn't take the test du... read more..

28 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3445

Out-of-Office Replies

I don't know about you, but I find those "Out-of-the-Office" e-mail auto-replies very ordinary and tedious. Here are some fun alternatives: 1. Thank you for your e-mail. Your credit card has been cha... read more..

26 Mar

One-liners

Susan Davis

1295

One-liner #1278

I have my doubts about disbelief.... read more..

26 Mar

Quotes

Susan Davis

1920

Quote #1720

"Our culture says that feelings of love are the basis for actions of love. And of course that can be true. But it is truer to say that actions of love can lead consistently to feelings of love." - read more..

25 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

796

Cybersalt News - March 25, 2018

Sunday greetings everyone! A wet start to spring has Rev. James Snyder thinking his wife should be in charge of the weather. You can read "Spring Has Sprung a Leak This Year" at:www.cybersalt.org/god... read more..

24 Mar

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

1395

Spring Has Sprung a Leak This Year

It was in the middle of February during a very shivering cold time that the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage said most dramatically, “I can’t wait for Spring. When in the world is Spring going to ge... read more..

24 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

5716

Comments Never Heard at Church

1. Hey! It's my turn to sit in the front pew. 2. I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon went 25 minutes over time. 3. Personally I find witnessing much more enjoyab read more..

24 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2356

New Family Member

A few years after I was born, my Dad met a stranger who was new to our small Ohio town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our famil... read more..

24 Mar

Quotes

Susan Davis

2092

Quote #1719

When they brought the colt to Jesus and threw their cloaks over it, he sat on it. Many people spread their cloaks on the road, while others spread branches they had cut in the fields. Those who went read more..

23 Mar

One-liners

Susan Davis

1435

One-liner #1277

"Things that upset a chihuahua may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great Dane." - Smiley Blanton read more..

22 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

972

Cybersalt News - March 22, 2018

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! Elephants are often known for their strength, but even they have rough days at work. As proof, check out the larger version of "Elephant Exhaustion" at:www.cybersalt.org/fu... read more..

22 Mar

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1298

Dew, Cough, Rain...

It's so quiet you can hear a pun drop.... read more..

21 Mar

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

2874

Newlywed Mornings

A young couple decided to wed. As the big day approached, they grew apprehensive. Each had a problem they had never before shared with anyone, not even each other. The Groom-to-be, overcoming his fea... read more..

21 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2095

Racism

Upon being denied, in the 1950's, membership in the exclusive Hollywood Country Club, because he was a Jew, Groucho Marx (whose father was a Jew, but whose mother was not) wrote a letter to the club's... read more..

21 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3754

Horse Woes

Two cowboy friends, Wally and Dallas, each bought a horse one summer. They enjoyed riding around and doing the things that cowboys do. When winter came, however, they did not want to pay to have their... read more..

21 Mar

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1293

Translation Friendship

It's hard to connect with my King-James-only buddy... He refuses to receptus my textus.... read more..

21 Mar

Quotes

Susan Davis

1544

Quote #1718

"In all the stories of Jesus' compassion, we are never told that he had compassion on someone because they deserved it. It was only because they were in need." - John Ortberg read more..

19 Mar

One-liners

Susan Davis

1315

One-liner #1276

"Who are these kids and why are they calling me Mom?" read more..

18 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

793

Cybersalt News - March 18, 2018

Sunday greetings everyone! This week, Rev. James Snyder's wife left him alone with the microwave oven and a pizza. What could go wrong? You'll know if you read "When I’m beside Myself, I’m in Bad Com... read more..

17 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3802

Sunday Compliment

The minister gave his Sunday morning service, as usual, but this particular Sunday, it was considerably longer than normal. Later, at the door, shaking hands with parishioners as they moved out, one ... read more..

17 Mar

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2799

Gray Hair

“When she saw her first strands of gray hair she thought she'd dye.”... read more..

17 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1836

Service, Humility, Parenting

We were standing in line outside a busy restaurant. The harried hostess was checking to find out how many people were in each group. "Party of two," the woman behind us said to her, "and could we plea... read more..