***To get the most out of this joke from the past, it helps if you remember the 2000 US presidential election. If you do remember those days, good for you. If you don't, even better! Fortunately for Santa, it seems he doesn't have the added factor of an electoral college!***
Ho Ho Ho
Hello out there, all people of the world. This is Santa and I just wanted to let you know that Christmas may be a little late this year. See, after checking all the boxes and tallying them up, I found some problems with the results.
The first result showed: 428,534,120 Good 428,523,119 Bad. The second result showed: 428,534,118 Good 428,523,121 Bad.
So you see, I can't, with good faith, go out and deliver presents while knowing I could have made a mistake. Maybe Little Johnny was good for once, then again, maybe not.
So, I have enlisted the help of all my elves and the Mrs. to help do a recount. We hope to have this finished up by 5pm on the 24th of December, but there is a possibility that it might take longer. You see, the tally cards were not quite clear to me; although I made them myself, I forgot what they meant. You know, Good...and Bad??? And the check marks I used were not all the same, some went left, some right, some were just a mark, some went through both boxes, and some didn't even have much of a mark on them. I leave it up to them to decide what I meant.
So if you wake up on Christmas morning, and there are no presents under your tree, at least you can tell the kids the story. Thank you for your patience and understanding in these trying times.
Santa